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Writing Samples
Band 5

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean Island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comaparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean Island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comaparisons where relevant.
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The line graph demonstrates the number of travellers staying on cruise
ships
Use synonyms
 and on a Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
 in the period from 2010 to 2017.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 total number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
 fluctuated between 2010 and 2016 before it rapidly rocketed to a peak at 3.5 in 2017.
Although
Linking Words
 the proportion of people who
perferred
Correct your spelling
preferred
 to stay on the
ships
Use synonyms
 was the lowest quantity in 2010, it was larger than the number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people who liked to stay on the
island
Use synonyms
. In 2010, the amount of visitors staying on cruise
ships
Use synonyms
 was approximately 0.3
million
Use synonyms
 and slightly rose to 0.5
million
Use synonyms
 in 2011. After it dropped to 0.3
million
Use synonyms
 in 2012, it gradually surged from 0.5
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 in 2013 to a peak of 2
million
Use synonyms
 in 2017.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the figure of tourists who stayed on the Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
 was almost 0.8
million
Use synonyms
 for a year from 2010 to 2011.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, there was
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 upward trend of around 1.5
million
Use synonyms
 in 2013 and became steady in 2015. It can be noticed that the quantity of
this
Linking Words
 travelling trend plunged to 1.3
million
Use synonyms
 in 2016 before it climbed up to 1.5
million
Use synonyms
 in 2017, which was lower than the count of travelling by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cruise
ships
Use synonyms
.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words ships, island, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • steady increase
  • gradual rise
  • significant surge
  • tourism industry
  • marketing efforts
  • improved infrastructure
  • new attractions
  • slight decline
  • plateau
  • saturation
  • external economic factors
  • renewed increase
  • promotional strategies
  • broader trends
  • economic recoveries
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