Some people believe that the purpose of education is to prepare useful members of society. Others say that the purpose of education is to achieve personal wishes. Discuss views and give your opinion.

#people #purpose #education #members #society

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It is said that several individuals think it is useful for members of society to be educated,

whereas

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other

people

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say that the purpose of having qualifications is to obtain personal wishes.

This

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essay will argue both views on attending university and I will present my viewpoint. On the one hand,

universities

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prepare students for significant jobs that help society and countries.

For instance

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, if

people

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have no doctors and nurses, they cannot survive the new diseases that appear in the future.

Secondly

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universities

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need to attract new professors who have intelligent brains to teach their students.

This

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leads to growth in opportunities and aids unemployed

people

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to obtain jobs.

Finally

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, I completely agree that

people

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should have university degrees to help their society.

On the other hand

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, there is a strong argument against going to

universities

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to get certificates. It can be challenging

due to

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cultural reasons. education institutions can lead to misunderstandings and difficulties in adjusting to the new environment.

For instance

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, I recently read an article published by The Discover that reveals that many

people

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have been negatively affected by the culture in Saudi Arabia. Indeed,

this

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is a clear indication that individuals do not need to have degrees in their lives. In conclusion, there are strong arguments both for and against attending university degrees. The argument supporting

universities

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relates to the nation.

On the other hand

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, the argument against getting certificates is related to culture.

Overall

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it is clear that

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this

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issue needs

further

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research and discussion before a decision should be made.

Submitted by mohsenakhlaghiplc on Thu Dec 19 2024

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task achievement

Although the main points are clear, provide more specific examples to strengthen your argument. This will help in making your essay more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is logically structured, but using more transition words and phrases can further enhance the flow between ideas.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively encapsulate your arguments.

task achievement

You successfully presented both views on the topic, showing a balanced discussion.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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