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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Should students be required to wear uniforms at school?

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There is no denying the fact that school
uniforms
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 are a debated topic in many countries.
While
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 some people believe that
uniforms
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 promote discipline and equality, others argue that they limit
students
Use synonyms
' freedom of expression. In my opinion, I believe both sides have valid points, which will be discussed in
this
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 essay.
To begin
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 with, school
uniforms
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 can create a sense of discipline and unity among
students
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.
In other words
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, wearing the same clothing reduces distractions and allows
students
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 to focus more on their studies.
For example
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, a study showed that schools with
uniforms
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 had fewer
behavioral
Change the spelling
behavioural
show examples
 issues than those without.
Additionally
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,
uniforms
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 help reduce economic inequality among
students
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. By wearing the same attire,
students
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 from low-income families are less likely to feel excluded or embarrassed about their financial situation.
This
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 fosters a more inclusive school environment where
students
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 are judged by their abilities rather than their appearance.
On the other hand
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, some people feel that
uniforms
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 restrict individuality. It is
also
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 possible to say that allowing
students
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 to wear their own clothes helps them express their personalities.
For instance
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,
students
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 can use fashion to show their interests or creativity, which can boost their confidence.
Furthermore
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, some families argue that buying
uniforms
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 adds extra costs to their budgets. Unlike regular clothing,
uniforms
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 are often expensive and must be purchased from specific suppliers.
This
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 can place unnecessary financial pressure on parents, especially if their children outgrow
uniforms
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 frequently. In conclusion, despite the valid arguments on both sides, I believe the benefits of
uniforms
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,
such
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 as promoting discipline and reducing inequality, outweigh the disadvantages. Schools should consider adopting policies that balance uniform rules with opportunities for self-expression, ensuring a positive learning environment for all
students
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.

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task response
To strengthen your essay even further, consider elaborating a bit more on the counterarguments to provide a more balanced approach.
coherence and cohesion
Transition words are used effectively, but consider varying them to elevate the cohesive flow even further.
introduction conclusion
The essay has a clear introduction that outlines both perspectives, which is effective in setting up the discussion.
supported main points
Most main points are supported with relevant examples and explanations, leading to a comprehensive response.
logical structure
The structure of the essay is logical, which helps the reader easily follow your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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