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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows local catches and imports of fresh fish into Perth, Australia for the years 2004 - 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows local catches and imports of fresh fish into Perth, Australia for the years 2004 - 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#imports #fish #perth #australia #years #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The table describes the
number
Use synonyms
 of fresh
fish
Use synonyms
 from
locar
Correct your spelling
local
farmer
Fix the agreement mistake
farmers
show examples
and
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 was bought from
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 Perth, in the period of 2004 to 2014. Generally, it is clearly seen that over ten years the total of fresh
fish
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 in Perth significantly increased. Other than that, the amount of local catches was always bigger than the
import
Change the verb form
imported
show examples
fish
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 2004, the total of fresh
fish
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 was 3142,2
tons
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.
This
Linking Words
number
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 considerably
growth
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grew
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 and reached a peak in 2009, with 8949
tons
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.
However
Linking Words
, after 2009, the total
fish
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 fluctuated, with 5814,7
tons
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 in 2014. Looking more closely
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the resources of the
fish
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, from 2004 to 2014, the
fish
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 production was dominated by
fish
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 that
bought
Add a missing verb
were bought
show examples
 from local
fisherman
Fix the agreement mistake
fishermen
show examples
.
While
Linking Words
 the total supply from
farmer
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farmers
show examples
 was always above 2000
tons
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, imported fresh
fish
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 only bought below 1300
ton
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tons
show examples
 per year.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, the biggest
number
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 of
supply
Fix the agreement mistake
supplies
show examples
 from local
fisherman
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fishermen
show examples
 was in 2008, with more than 800
tons
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,
whereas
Linking Words
 the biggest
number
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 of imported
fish
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 was in 2012, with 1227,3
tons
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by accttaa on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, fish, tons with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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