Crime rate in most countries is often higher in urban areas than rural areas. why do you think that is? what can be done to reduce crime rate?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Half of people believe that equal rights between males and females have been achieved,
while
Linking Words
others feel that more
progress
Use synonyms
is needed to clarify the extent of
equality
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss
both
Use synonyms
perspectives on fairness.
While
Linking Words
significant
progress
Use synonyms
has been made in achieving
equality
Use synonyms
, there is still room for improvement. On the side supporting the notion of
equality
Use synonyms
, gender roles in many countries have changed considerably.
For example
Linking Words
, there has been noticeable
progress
Use synonyms
in balancing responsibilities between men and women. In many developing countries,
both
Use synonyms
genders are now participating equally in various aspects of
society
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
marks a significant difference compared to the 1980s or earlier.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, women now hold degrees on par with men, and in some cases, the government has even introduced policies for equal pay.
However
Linking Words
, on the opposing side, there is a belief that more clarity is needed before we can confidently say that we are living in a
society
Use synonyms
that fully supports and respects
both
Use synonyms
male and female identities. Issues
such
Linking Words
as feminist theories and male entitlement continue to create challenges. These issues hinder the
progress
Use synonyms
of
society
Use synonyms
. Feminism,
for instance
Linking Words
, remains a topic of ongoing debate, and some women,
along with
Linking Words
the opposing gender, contribute to the tension.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, male entitlement often arises from an inflated sense of ego, where men make decisions without considering others, leading to division and resentment. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
we are making
progress
Use synonyms
toward gender
equality
Use synonyms
, there are still significant issues to address. Year by year, the situation is improving, but we must continue to work toward a
society
Use synonyms
where
both
Use synonyms
genders are fully supported and respected. In my view,
both
Use synonyms
sides are correct, as we have made strides, but there is still work to be done to achieve complete fairness

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
While the structure of the essay is generally logical, some points can be more elaborated to provide deeper insights. Consider connecting examples more explicitly to the main argument to enhance coherence.
Task Achievement
Try to incorporate more specific examples that clearly illustrate some of the issues discussed, such as feminist theories and male entitlement, to strengthen your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay provides a strong introduction and conclusion that effectively frame the discussion around gender equality.
Task Achievement
The ideas are clear and comprehensive, with a good balance of perspectives presented. The discussion on gender roles evolution and current societal challenges are well-handled.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • anonymity
  • social cohesion
  • socioeconomic disparities
  • desperation
  • urban stressors
  • mental health
  • community policing
  • job opportunities
  • poverty
  • inequality
  • public spaces
  • surveillance cameras
  • deterrent
  • recidivism
  • reintegration programs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: