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Writing Samples
Band 8

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Introduction
Nowadays, whether governments should focus on railway development more than
roads
Use synonyms
 has become a topic of discussion. In my opinion, funds should be allocated to expand railways
due to
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 the importance of public transport. In
this
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 essay, I will explore some reasons to support my opinion.
Body · 1
It is my view that the improvement of public transport, especially the train system, is beneficial for solving some social problems
such
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 as traffic congestion and air pollution. As it leads to a significant decline in terms of using private cars.
For example
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, if people have easy access to public transportation like the
metro
Use synonyms
, they will use it to reach their destination.
Therefore
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, investing in railways is a more efficient strategy for governments to address the traffic jam.
Body · 2
In contrast
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, some people claim that financial resources should be spent on
roads
Use synonyms
. They firmly insist that most individuals use their vehicles to commute, making road expansion and renovation more important than establishing railways. I do not find
this
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 argument convincing as I think the more money
that is
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 spent on
roads
Use synonyms
, the fewer people will be encouraged to use public transportation like the
metro
Use synonyms
.
For example
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, a study published by Oxford University in 2019 revealed that the improvement of the
metro
Use synonyms
 system in England significantly reduced the usage of private cars.
Moreover
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, using the train is more affordable and user-friendly.
In addition
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, individuals can reach their destination quickly and conveniently without any concerns.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I completely agree with prioritizing railway development to spend more money rather than
roads
Use synonyms
 because I consider it a mechanism for alleviating traffic congestion and air pollution.
Furthermore
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, the
metro
Use synonyms
 is not only faster and more comfortable, but it is
also
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 a more eco-friendly way to commute.

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task achievement
Try to address potential counterarguments more thoroughly and integrate them seamlessly into your essay. Acknowledging and discussing these counterpoints in more detail would strengthen your argument even further.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structure to avoid repetition and enhance the overall flow of your writing. By incorporating a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences, your essay can become more engaging.
task achievement
You provided a clear and direct response to the task, offering several supporting points and examples.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical and coherent structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
You utilized relevant and specific examples, such as the Oxford University study, to support your argument well.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
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