Being a celebrity - such as a famous film star or sports personality - brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?

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Nowadays, becoming a
celebrity
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like a famous film star or an athlete can bring issues and advantages.
This
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is an interesting topic. In
this
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essay, I will provide some opinions on
this
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matter. In
this
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era, most people want to become a
celebrity
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like actors or sports players.
This
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will bring more problems because usually becoming superstars will there are a lot of people who intend to
provide
Verb problem
have
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negative impacts on us. If we can not select a good
friendship
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consequently
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, we will be influenced by a bad
friendship
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.
For example
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, there is a religious person who was previously never to go to a
night club
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nightclub
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and party. After he becomes a
celebrity
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, he is influenced by a bad
friendship
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and ultimately, he is always addicted
drinking
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to drinking
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alcohol and becoming intoxicated.
Hence
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, if you feel it is easier to be influenced by a bad
friendship
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, I suggest you stop dreaming of becoming a superstar.
In addition
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, if you become a
celebrity
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, your life will always be watched by the media. Even if you face a problem, your issue will
spread
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to the public very quickly.
For instance
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, when there is a
celebrity
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who gets difficulty in his life and he selects to keep his problem in order that your public does not
spread
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to the public.
However
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, a few days later, his issue has already
spread
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to the public. So, very difficult to keep your issue in order so that do not
spread
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to the public. In conclusion, becoming a
celebrity
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is not easy. A life under constant media scrutiny and exposure to influential people can have negative impacts,
such
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as falling into bad friendships or losing privacy. If it's hard to avoid bad influences, it's better to reconsider the dream of becoming a superstar.
Submitted by akbarsurya264 on

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task achievement
You have introduced the topic clearly and provided a conclusion. Consider elaborating more on your main points in the body paragraphs to make your argument more comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly connects to the next. While your essay is mostly cohesive, the connection between ideas in paragraphs could be improved for better logical flow.
coherence cohesion
The essay has an introduction and conclusion, providing a clear frame for your argument.
task achievement
You addressed both the problems and benefits of being a celebrity, which shows an effort to tackle the essay question comprehensively.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Public scrutiny
  • Intrusive
  • Endorsements
  • Sponsorships
  • Financial security
  • High-profile collaborations
  • Social influence
  • Philanthropic efforts
  • Trust issues
  • Mental health challenges
  • Substance abuse
  • Pressures of celebrity
  • Expectations
  • Disconnect from reality
  • Normalcy
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