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Writing Samples
Band 8

Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the work. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#year #languages #people #life #work
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In the new era, the number of
languages
Use synonyms
 across the world is decreasing.
In addition
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, a group of people believe it is a positive trend owing to the
fact
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 that the smaller range of
language
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 in the work brings a more comfortable life. I do not subscribe to
this
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 idea inasmuch as cultural diversity and cognitive benefits are more crucial. On the one hand, the
fact
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that is
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 really important is that
language
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 is one aspect of the culture;
as a result
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, when the
language
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 becomes extinct in communities,
then
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 have a cultural erosion. In
fact
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, globalization has an adverse effect on these kinds of societies because , in the long run, they forget their history, beliefs, and so on and lose their identity.
for instance
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, when Iranians will change their
language
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 to English, Persian will die out.
Thereafter
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, the History , traditional norms, and costumes will be Westernised.
On the other hand
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, if populations need to work with people who have various
languages
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 all over the world, they have to learn a range of
languages
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 other than their native tongue.
In other words
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, multilingualism creates a chance for global communities to have cognitive on account of the
fact
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 that they are able to not only enhance their skills but
also
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 solve their problems in the best ways.
To sum up
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, working with some
languages
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 has several merits for global businesses;
however
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, losing
language
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 is the same as the populations become homogenised.
Consequently
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, cultural diversity, identity, and the advantages that learning a new
language
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 in people's decisions are destroyed.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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grammar
Ensure a consistent tense usage throughout the essay. Some shifts affect clarity.
task response
Clarify examples for better relevancy, such as mentioning specific countries where languages are endangered.
introduction
Introduction clearly presents the topic and your stance.
coherence
Each paragraph contains clear main points and are logically structured, contributing to a coherent flow.
conclusion
Conclusion effectively sums up your argument and aligns with the introduction.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Linguistic diversity
  • Cultural heritage
  • Monolithic global culture
  • Language extinction
  • Bilingualism
  • Cognitive benefits
  • Cultural erosion
  • Global communication
  • Identity and community
  • Problem-solving
  • Language preservation
  • Heritage languages
  • Multilingualism
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