Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cellphone tracking and security cameras. In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#technology #people #cellphone #security #cameras #cases #development

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Nowadays, one of the topics of discussion is if technology can be used for monitoring people meanwhile they are using their electronic devices.

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, in

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essay, I am going to argue why the advantages of

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development outweigh the disadvantages. First of all,

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type of technology is very useful for intelligent services like the police or

the

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apply

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military

institution

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institutions

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, because it can be used to track any electronic devices, like

cellphones

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cell phones

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, computers or security cameras.

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, if the FBI needs to investigate a potential suspect from a crime organization it has to be able to have these electronic tools. If

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is not the case, how they are going to find all the necessary information to locate criminals

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However

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this

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type of technology has its downfalls, because many digital users do not know that they are being tracked or that their personal info is being seen by other individuals.

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is not just that intelligent services have the data of many of us, it is that our information can be seen by a lot of people or enterprises that why do not know about.

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, there is an internet market that sells our cookies (data users), and

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has to be regulated by governments. In conclusion, in my opinion, institutions (like police forces) need to have the tools to access our personal information, but only if

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is necessary for an investigation.

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, governments should make policies that create a secure environment in the digital area that prevents user's data to not being vulnerable.

Submitted by samuel.vicuna2003l on Sat Dec 28 2024

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task achievement

Ensure the introduction clearly outlines both the benefits and the downsides of the topic.

coherence cohesion

Avoid repeating similar ideas in different parts of the essay to maintain focus.

task achievement

For a clearer analysis, consider examining both viewpoints before concluding why one outweighs the other.

introduction conclusion

The essay effectively introduces the topic and presents a balanced view in the introduction and conclusion.

logical structure

Ideas are logically structured into paragraphs, allowing for smooth transitions and progression of thought.

relevant specific examples

Examples provided, such as the role of the FBI, enhance the arguments about the advantages of technological monitoring.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

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Fully explain your ideas

Some Universities in less developed countries hire professors from well-known universities to improve the quality of education. Some believe that this is not a perfect solution and there are other ways to enhance the quality of education. DO you agree or disagree?

Some people like to own the place where they live, but other people like to rent where they live. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is important for all towns and cities to have large public outdoor places like squares and parks. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some children speand a long time each day on their smartphones. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?