15. Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

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There is the perspective that allowing children to make their own decisions in daily life tends to have the children think about their own.
However
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, some people believe that
this
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skill is crucial for the youth. Both sides will be explained
along with
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my opinions and relevant examples.
First,
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although
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being alone is common these days, individuals need to prioritize themselves mainly. Training teenagers how to make their own ways can probably lead to self-centering because of
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of caring for others.
Moreover
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, commoners normally tend to be concerned about themselves and have less interaction with others. Allowing the children to select their own path might stop contact with ones that should be a future relationship and commune.
For example
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, The questionnaire revealed that 80
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
of the younger generation who feel normal to make a decision by themselves have less empathy and socialization compared to those
being
Verb problem
who are
show examples
uncertain to
decide
Wrong verb form
deciding
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
matters.
On the other hand
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, the key to letting the child select their own choices is living in the future without a guardian which is a big part of becoming an adult. Ageing comes
along with
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the responsibility
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
managing life.
Moreover
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, deciding their own choices can lead to what someone really
desire
Change the verb form
desires
show examples
, not what others tell them to follow. Self-knowing is an essential skill that the child should focus on
while
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they are young to create a future dream life. For exemplify, the pediatric psychiatrist of Harvard Medical School suggested that parents should leave some space for letting their kids choose an alternative and get the lesson from what is done by them for constructing self-awareness which is the key to getting older.
To conclude
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, Letting the young one make a decision on everyday matters affects individuals to have less conversation and
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
selfishness which leads to each person thinking only their
own
Correct word choice
or own
show examples
story
while
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some individuals believe that the kids should consider and decide the way by themselves for dealing with maturity and searching for their own soul.
Submitted by amittawin on

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Logical Structure
Ensure each paragraph clearly supports your overall position. Some topics could be more deeply analyzed to enhance the argument.
Supported Main Points
Continue to ensure that all arguments are backed by focused examples, as some were slightly generalized or could be expanded further.
Introduction & Conclusion Present
Your essay includes an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which demonstrates a clear structural approach.
Complete Response
The essay shows an effort to engage with both sides of the argument, which completes the response adequately.
Relevant Specific Examples
Attempts were made to incorporate examples, such as the Harvard Medical School suggestion, which helped illustrate your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • autonomy
  • independence
  • critical thinking
  • collective well-being
  • selfishness
  • overemphasis
  • real-world situations
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • boundaries
  • guidance
  • moderation
  • maturity
  • decision-making power
  • personal growth
  • social awareness
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