Some people believe that some unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (e.g. working in a charity, improving the relationship of neighborhood or teaching sports to children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?
#people #community #service #part #school #programs #e #g #charity #relationship #neighborhood #sports #children
In recent years, the discourse surrounding
community
Use synonyms
services
has garnered meticulous attention, prompting a plethora of viewpoints among the government and the general populace. Proponents of Use synonyms
community
Use synonyms
services
to be a part of school curriculum argue, that it offers numerous advantages to society. Use synonyms
Hence
, in my firm conviction, I believe Linking Words
such
programs will result in several long-term successes and a more sustainable future.
To commence, proponents assert that Linking Words
community
Use synonyms
services
among youth may lead to substantial advancements. Use synonyms
For example
, countries like Japan, develop their academic subjects to contain a great deal of Linking Words
community
Use synonyms
services
, which fosters Use synonyms
overall
innovations and enhances their economic growth. Linking Words
Furthermore
, it is often posited that volunteering work, especially in Linking Words
charity
, can ameliorate the moral value of young people. Use synonyms
However
, by increasing the Linking Words
charity
activities, societies Use synonyms
also
could benefit as it can empower cutting-edge resources which in turn will improve productivity and quality of life.
Linking Words
Moreover
, advocates propose that working in volunteering activities can generate social equity by providing access to essential resources and opportunities that were previously unattainable.
Linking Words
Conversely
, critics may propound that the implications of Linking Words
charity
work in schools are not entirely beneficial. They highlight the potential pitfalls, Use synonyms
such
as exacerbating the issues of the academic field and educational degradation. Linking Words
For example
, Linking Words
charity
work could be considered as a potential disturbance to the students. Several students are going to lose their interest in school subjects, and they will tend to practice more outdoor activities.
In conclusion, it seems both sides are painting unreal pictures of each other. Ultimately, it is crucial to approach Use synonyms
this
issue with a balanced perspective, recognizing that Linking Words
while
risks are considerable, the positive effect of volunteering remains a compelling argument. Linking Words
Therefore
, policymakers must navigate these complexities judiciously to harness the benefits Linking Words
while
mitigating the adverse effects.Linking Words
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task achievement
Ensure all examples are relevant and specific to strengthen the argument. Your example of Japan could be elaborated more to show how community service integrates with the curriculum.
task achievement
Provide more balance by elaborating on possible concerns critics have regarding compulsory community service in schools. This will demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the issue.
coherence cohesion
Link ideas more explicitly within and between paragraphs to enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a complete view of the argument.
task achievement
Main points are effectively supported with examples, although some could be more detailed.
task achievement
The essay consistently maintains a formal and academic tone appropriate for the task.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example