Some people believe that the government should take care of old people and provide financial support after they retire. Others say individuals should save during their working years to fund their retirement. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #government #care #support #individuals #years #fund #retirement

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Opinions are often divided on some

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

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believe that the

government

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should take responsibility

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for

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ancients after they retire.

However

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, others say

people

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should save assets during their working timeline for the stage of retirement.Both opinions will be analyzed in

this

Linking Words

essay before a reasoned conclusion is drawn. On the one hand, many proponents argue that

government

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should take care of aged

people

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and

support

Use synonyms

them financially after they retire. As

Add a verb

it is

it was

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really hard to save assets

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apply

show examples

nowadays

due to

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inflation,

specially

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especially

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humans

Change preposition

for humans

show examples

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

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with limited salaries

only

Correct word choice

and only

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can arrange

there

Replace the word

their

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daily expenses

such

Linking Words

giving

Verb problem

paying

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home bills and

children

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children's

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education fees.

For example

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, in European countries, there is a passion and free healthcare for the

acients

Correct your spelling

ancients

patients

In contrast

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, there are

also

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

shelters

homes

Correct word choice

and homes

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which provide them

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with a

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good life.In

this

Linking Words

case, it is obvious why many feel certain that

government

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should take responsibility

Change preposition

for

show examples

old individuals.

However

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, the advocates of the

later

Correct your spelling

latter

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view counter

this

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argument by citing that individuals should save money in their early years for after retirement life.

People

Use synonyms

who typically share

this

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point of view usually defend it by arguing that

Use synonyms

government

Correct article usage

the government

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cannot be responsible for every single ancient human.

As there

Correct word choice

There

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are numerous other factors of the nation where

Use synonyms

government

Add an article

the government

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have to invest

such

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as building dams and roads.

For instance

Linking Words

, in abroad states,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

passions are only given to nationalities holders humans.

In contrast

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,in developing nations

such

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as Syria,the passions are not given because of the low economic growth.

Thus

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, it is understandable why

this

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point of view has garnered

support

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. After looking at both the arguments of those in

support

Use synonyms

of the

government

Use synonyms

should take care of older

people

Use synonyms

and those in opposition, it can be concluded that

Thus

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, it is considered

to state

Verb problem

apply

show examples

that the

government

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should

support

Use synonyms

old individuals financially and ancient should

also

Linking Words

have some

saving

Fix the agreement mistake

savings

show examples

for surviving their retirement life.

Submitted by nidarif855 on Sun Jan 12 2025

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task achievement

To improve task achievement, focus on elaborating your ideas and providing more detailed examples that directly relate to the main points.

coherence cohesion

Work on ensuring that each paragraph flows naturally to the next, using appropriate linking words and phrases.

coherence cohesion

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which structure the essay effectively.

task achievement

You presented both views with some valid points, showing a good understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

307 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial support
retirement
government intervention
contribute to society
financial independence
safety net
personal responsibility
self-reliance
financial education
incentives
individual circumstances
sustainable

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Some people believe that the government should take care of old people and provide financial support after they retire. Others say individuals should save during their working years to fund their retirement. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Some peple think that cities are the best place to live. Others prefer to live in the countryside. Discuss both views and guve your own opinions.

Your friend will stay with you on holiday, but you are unavailable on that date. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter apologize for not being able to be there; give a reason why you are not available; suggest another day for your friend's visit.

You use the local swimming pool often and during one of your visits you have encountered a problem. Write a letter to the manager and say – What the problem was and when it happened – What the swimming pool staff have done about it – Suggest your own solution to the problem.

Nowadays, some buildings such as offices and school have open space design instead of seperate rooms. Why is it so? Do you think it is a positive development or negative?

The use of Social Media is replacing face-to-face contact with many people. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?