Successful ports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is not fair. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some individuals believe that
sports
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

professionals deserve to sign contracts for millions of
dollors
Correct your spelling
dollars

If you don’t want dollors to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

other people think that people who
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in important roles, receive unfair
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts

It seems that amount may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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of
money
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

comparing
Change the form of the verb
compared

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb comparing. Consider changing it.

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to those who play
sports
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
In
Change preposition
From

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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my perspective, I feel
sports
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

players
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

gain illogical
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries

It seems that salary may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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comapring
Correct your spelling
compared

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to those who
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in societal professions, and
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay will
shows
Change the verb form
show

The verb shows after the modal verb will does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

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both views and give its own opinion.
Sport
Change the noun form
Sports

It appears that the noun Sport is being used as an adjective, but you may have chosen incorrectly between the singular and plural form. Consider changing the noun form.

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players
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

earning
Wrong verb form
earn

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb earning. Consider changing it.

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more
money
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

nowadays, and they
signing
Wrong verb form
sign

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb signing. Consider changing it.

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deals with clups and advertisements for millions of
dollors
Correct your spelling
dollars

If you don’t want dollors to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, for a year at least, and most of them
sarted
Correct your spelling
started

If you don’t want sarted to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

their career as
hobby
Add an article
a hobby

The noun phrase hobby seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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from
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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their childhood ending them
being
Verb problem
becoming

There may be a verb use issue here.

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professional
players
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

why
all
Add a missing verb
is all

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

amount
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

bening
Correct your spelling
being

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given to these
players
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

?.
Change the punctuation
?

The punctuation mark may be incorrect here. Consider changing it.

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Pepole
Correct your spelling
People

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tend to
soppurt
Correct your spelling
support

If you don’t want soppurt to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

teams and
clups
Correct your spelling
clubs
clips

If you don’t want clups to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, so they accept their
players
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to gain
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

amount
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of revenue, because of their dedication and unique skills.
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Whereas
Correct word choice
On

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
on the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, others believe those who
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
sports
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

professions,
they did
Wrong verb form
do

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb they did. Consider changing it.

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not deserve to gain
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

amount
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

comparing
Wrong verb form
compared

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb comparing. Consider changing it.

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with those who
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in sectors
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
eduction
Correct your spelling
education

The word eduction doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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or
helthcare
Correct your spelling
healthcare
health care

If you don’t want helthcare to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

. They think those
contrubuted
Correct your spelling
contributed

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to
deveolp
Correct your spelling
develop

If you don’t want deveolp to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

the nation and they have
sociteal
Correct your spelling
societal
social

If you don’t want sociteal to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

well-being,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

professtional
Correct your spelling
professional

If you don’t want professtional to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

players
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

did
Wrong verb form
do

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb did. Consider changing it.

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not apply to
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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socity
Correct your spelling
society

If you don’t want socity to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

anything and they just
entertainnig
Correct your spelling
entertained

If you don’t want entertainnig to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

the observers. In my opinion,
sports
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

players
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

having high
wage
Fix the agreement mistake
wages

It seems that wage may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
is illogical, and I think they should receive the same
amount
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

like
Change preposition
as

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
other
professions
Replace the word
professionals

The word professions doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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and the
amount
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be
balnced
Correct your spelling
balanced

If you don’t want balnced to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

between them
and
Correct word choice
apply

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
it is not fair for
players
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to have
Linking Words
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

show examples
deals because they done nothing to the community
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

when we see other workers the done everything to the nation.

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task achievement
Ensure your arguments are well-developed and clearly supported with specific examples to strengthen your essay. Consider including examples such as famous sports players and their earnings compared to professionals in other roles.
coherence and cohesion
Focus on improving the clarity of your ideas by organizing your thoughts into distinct paragraphs with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
task achievement
You have addressed both views on the topic and provided your own opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both viewpoints, and a conclusion offering your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • justified
  • entertainment value
  • sponsorships
  • endorsements
  • media rights
  • market dynamics
  • societal well-being
  • financial gain
  • social responsibility
  • economic value
  • recognition
  • financial rewards
  • crucial professions
What to do next:
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