Video records are a better way to learn about the way other people live in the world live rather than written documents. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

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There is a statement that says the best
way
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to learn about someone's life is through records of
video
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rather than written documents. I personally agree with the statement,
due to
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access to visual information that could be obtained through
video
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records. In
this
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essay, I will explain more about the topic. To start with, people these days live their lives in various ways. The best
way
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to learn from it is to experience it by yourself.
However
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, the closest access that we can get is through a
video
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. As a matter of fact, many successful figures have started their episodes on vlogging on YouTube.
For instance
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, Iman Gadzhi is using social media as a platform to promote his lifestyle. Through a
video
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, we can access insight into these people's lives visually.
Therefore
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, I definitely agree that videography could be the best
way
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in
this
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matter.
On the other hand
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, written documents do have their own strengths. Through writing, we can learn more about the content in detail.
For example
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, the movie adaptation of a book sometimes lacks the detail that was written before. It is caused by visual implications that not everyone would notice.
Thus
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, we should not overlook the importance of a written documentary as well. In conclusion, I agree that
video
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recording is a better
way
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to learn about the
way
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others live.
Nevertheless
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, there are strengths that come with a written documentary that we should not ignore. A balanced combination of both should be the best
way
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in terms of learning.
Submitted by iigness05 on

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task achievement
While the essay presents a balanced viewpoint, try to delve deeper into the opposing perspective to ensure a more comprehensive discussion.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the use of cohesive devices to create smoother transitions between arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and a thoughtful conclusion that presents a personal viewpoint while summarizing the discussion.
task achievement
Your examples, such as the reference to Iman Gadzhi, effectively illustrate your point about learning through videos.
coherence cohesion
The argument is well-structured and each paragraph logically supports the main argument of the essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • visual and auditory
  • cultural practices
  • daily routines
  • real-time
  • emotions and reactions
  • immersive learning experience
  • detailed information
  • visual and emotional impact
  • nuances and complexities
  • enhance our understanding
What to do next:
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