Some people think that older school children should learn a wide range of subjects and develop knowledge. Others think that they should only study a small number of subjects in details. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #school #children #range #subjects #study

There has long been controversy about education policies and people have a multitude of views about what institution children should learn at faculty.

Although

there are good arguments in favour of having older school children focus on studying

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a small number of

subjects

details

Fix the agreement mistake

detail

show examples

, I personally believe that they should still learn a wide range of

subjects

in order to develop all-round knowledge. Studying a small number of practical

subjects

would allow

students

to have more employment opportunities with a better monetary return.

This

is because

students

can usually acquire professional

skills

in practical

subjects

and in turn, have a clearer career path.

For example

, doctors, lawyers, engineers and accountants can usually secure relatively

high paying

Add a hyphen

high-paying

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and stable jobs, where they are promoted from time to time.

Students

studying these

subjects

are more likely not only to be financially independent but

also

even support their parents.

Also

, as adults,

students

should be able to make their own living after they graduate from

universities

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university

show examples

or they will continue to impose the financial burden on their parents.

Moreover

, another point is to note that professional practical

subjects

can extensively train

students

problem-solving

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in problem-solving

show examples

skills

and critical thinking

skills

because they are preparing for a real-life situation. Despite the aforementioned reasons why older

students

should concentrate on studying a few

subjects

, I believe that they should learn a wide range of

subjects

and develop proficiency. One of the fundamental principles of education is that it should always be all-rounded, where not only intelligence should be passed on to

students

, but other elements

such

as social

skills

, correct values and physical development should

also

be considered equally vital. Some

subjects

may seem “useless” as they are not directly related to earning money in the future, but they are all crucial to

students

’ all-round development.

For instance

, if schools only teach

students

professional academic philosophy and entirely ignore their aesthetic and physical development, the

students

will transform into nothing more than working machines. Under

this

line of thinking,

although

students

may gain a better career

prospect

Fix the agreement mistake

prospects

show examples

and earn more money in the future if they only study a small number of

subjects

in their senior academy years

Submitted by tina fung on Sun Oct 11 2020

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure your introduction clearly addresses the topic and provides an outline of the main points you will cover in your essay. Also, make sure to include a conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your opinion.

Task Achievement

Make sure to fully address all aspects of the essay prompt, including both views and your own opinion. Provide clear and comprehensive ideas that are relevant to the topic. Support your points with specific, relevant examples.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

363 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that older school children should learn a wide range of subjects and develop knowledge. Others think that they should only study a small number of subjects in details. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. •To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You are going to take a short holiday in Singapore and you want to rent a holiday apartment while you are there. Write to the tourist information office. In your letter: -Explain what you need. -Say when you plan to be there. -Ask for information about prices.

The student who study from the school to university get benefit less and contribute less,than those of student who go to travel or job and get skills and experience brfore going high.Do you agree or disagree

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?