In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

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In some nations, young ones are told to

work

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hard in order to achieve anything they wish. In

this

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essay, I will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of adopting

such

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a mindset when dealing with

children

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. On the one hand, if we looked closely at the meaning behind that message, we would see that it aims to emphasize and encourage the

work

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and effort made by a child

instead

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of his/her inherited traits.

In other words

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, by adopting

this

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notion, equal opportunities will be given to the gifted and average youngsters, removing any difference among them and resulting in greater accomplishments.

For instance

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, studies have shown that on doing several tasks,

children

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who were praised for their effort showed a greater ability to

work

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and push themselves, discovering where their limit lies, than those who were praised for their intelligence, as they choose to only accept tasks that they thought their limitations lie within.

On the other hand

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, we must not forget that they are just

children

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Thus

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making them feel that their value is dependent on the amount of achievements they accomplish would likely lower their self-esteem and act as a pressuring force. on them.

This

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will result in reduced play and leisure time, which will negatively affect the development of their well-being. To illustrate, unlike the increased demand for excessive

work

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due to

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high academic pressure and competitiveness put on young learners, it has been proven that playing is essential in building certain skills

such

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as creativity, writing, and imagination.

For example

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, research done by a number of professionals has shown that preschoolers who play with dolls regularly have higher storytelling and writing skills.

Therefore

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, if

children

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overwork themselves, they will not ideally become better but will underdevelop in many other aspects. In conclusion, despite the fact that stating that with hard

work

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everything is achievable, pressuring young ones to overwork themselves will not mean greater accomplishments but might negatively affect their

overall

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ability to endure certain skills.

m.mahmoud.2005Tue Jan 14 2025

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task response

Provide a clearer thesis statement in the introduction to outline your main arguments. This will enhance the reader's understanding of your essay's direction.

coherence cohesion

Try to ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and supports it with relevant examples. This will make your argumentation stronger.

task response

The essay effectively identifies both the advantages and disadvantages of the topic, showing balance in your arguments.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are well-structured, providing a clear start and finish to the discussion.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

330 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

achieve
try hard
positive mindset
self-belief
motivates
ambitious goals
resilience
determination
confidence
self-esteem
growth mindset
unrealistic expectations
disappointment
failure
effort
hard work
seek support
individual differences
abilities
capabilities

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In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

some people believe that in order to reduce the rising obesity among children the school administration should make it necessary for every child to participate in sports and other outdoor activities. Do you agree or disagree?

These days, people in some countries are living in a throw-away society which means people use things in a short time then throw them away. What are the causes and what are the problems?

There is a good deal of evidence that increasing car use is contributing to global warming and having other undesirable effects on people’s health and well-being. What can be done to discourage people from using their cars?

In recent years, there has been an increasing trend of people from cities buying second homes in the countryside. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in todays world, subjects like Science and technology are most important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.