Details of politicians’ private lives should not be published in newspapers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is thought that
information
Use synonyms
regarding
politicians
Use synonyms
' personal lives should not be shared in print media. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
opinion, because sharing these details could be harmful for their families, and it might require breaking the law. First and foremost, what makes harmful of sharing
information
Use synonyms
about
politicians
Use synonyms
' lives is that
this
Linking Words
could have a detrimental effect not only on these individuals
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
Linking Words
on their families. Because revealing their personal lives can expose them to
unwind
Wrong verb form
unwinding
show examples
comments, and it might lead to a great level of distress.
For example
Linking Words
, in 2025, one of the ministers of Poland committed suicide
due to
Linking Words
not handling
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the pressure of the paparazzi invading his and his family's private life.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, disclosing their
information
Use synonyms
means breaking the law in the most cases.
This
Linking Words
is because the right to privacy is the fundamental right of every individual, and if journalists would like to share any details or photos related to anyone, the consent of the individual should be asked. Unfortunately, even in some cases, these personal details can be disclosed by
politicians
Use synonyms
' relatives or colleagues as they are bribed.
For instance
Linking Words
, Princess Diana was killed was partly caused by the paparazzi who followed her car, and shared her pictures publicly without her consent. In conclusion, I strongly support the suggestion that
politicians
Use synonyms
' personal
information
Use synonyms
should be kept secret, and it should not be the subject of newspapers because revealing
politicians
Use synonyms
'
information
Use synonyms
could destroy their family life, and
this
Linking Words
process could
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
result in wrongdoing.
Submitted by nazrin.ceferova on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Ensure all parts of the question are fully addressed. The essay predominantly discusses why details should not be published but could expand more on the opposing viewpoint to address it comprehensively.
Task Response
Work on some grammatical and punctuation improvements such as "share" instead of "shared" and watch the pluralization to enhance clarity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Broaden the range of transitional phrases used between sentences and paragraphs to make ideas flow more naturally.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, maintaining focus on the central argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Each paragraph is centered around a main idea, and the points are logically sequenced.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • intrusion
  • accountability
  • transparency
  • sensationalism
  • privacy
  • public interest
  • collateral damage
  • precedent
  • responsible journalism
  • exploitation
  • democratic processes
  • media culture
  • balance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: