(Livia) Your manager has asked you to arrange a party for a colleague who is leaving the company. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter – Suggest a suitable date and time for the party – Recommend a venue – Propose the food and entertainment options that should be available.

Dear Livia, I am writing in regard to Didar's farewell
party
. As I was given the task to organise it, I would like to share some details
wih
Correct your spelling
with
you.
To begin
, I talked to the team and Friday, February 30th, 2024 at 6:00 PM would be the best time for the
party
as it fits in everyone's schedule. People
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
are working can
also
get off work at 5:00 PM and get to the
party
in time. We have setup one of the conference rooms as a
party
room and we should able to seat everyone from the office. I
also
enquired about food preferences and allergies from the staff and everyone thinks we should order mexican, and I did contact Corna's the local mexican resteraunt as they have the best mexican food in our area. As we're all adults here, I was
also
considering buying some beers as well if that can be approved by you. I have
also
arranged a DJ to come and setup some speakers so we can have some music and dancing. If you have any suggestions for the
party
, please reach me back through
this
email. Best regards, Aksh
Submitted by rjp.deep on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure to carefully proofread your dates and facts. February 30th does not exist, which may confuse the reader or detract from the professionalism. Aim to use accurate and plausible details in your writing.
task achievement
In professional or semi-formal letters, maintain a respectful and moderately formal tone throughout. The phrase 'as we're all adults here' could be seen as slightly informal in tone. Consider using 'Considering we're all adults, I propose purchasing some beers...' for a more polished expression.
coherence cohesion
Your letter shows a strong structure with distinct paragraphs addressing specific aspects of the party, which is good practice. However, enhancing transitions between paragraphs can improve the flow. Examples include 'In addition to the date and time,' before discussing the venue or 'Regarding food and entertainment,' to introduce those suggestions.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing of your letter are generally well-done but can be improved for a more formal touch. Using 'Dear [Manager's Last Name],' can enhance formality, and a slightly more formal closing, such as 'Sincerely' or 'Kind regards,' could be more appropriate in a professional context.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: