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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that robots are very important for the future of human development, while others believe that they are dangerous and have a negative impact on society. Discuss both perspectives and give your opinion

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n recent years, the inherent complexity of societal issues has sparked considerable debate
due to
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 the diversity of perspectives within society. One
such
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 issue is the role of
robots
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 in human development, which has divided opinion. On the one hand, some people believe that
robots
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 are essential for the future of human progress,
while
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on the other hand
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, others argue that they pose significant risks and could negatively impact society.
This
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 essay will undertake a meticulous examination of both sides of the argument, comparing and contrasting their respective positions, and will be supported by a well-reasoned conclusion. Initiating with an exploration of the arguments in
favor
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favour
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 of the first viewpoint, proponents of
this
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 position maintain that
robots
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 are critical for advancing technology and improving efficiency.
Robots
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 have revolutionized industries
such
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 as manufacturing and healthcare, where they perform tasks with unparalleled precision and speed.
For example
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, robotic-assisted surgeries have significantly improved patient outcomes, with empirical research demonstrating reduced recovery times and enhanced accuracy compared to traditional methods. These findings strongly suggest that
robots
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 offer valuable benefits, leading many to believe in their transformative role in shaping a better future.
On the other hand
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,
skeptics
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sceptics
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 argue that the increasing reliance on
robots
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 could lead to adverse societal consequences. One key concern is the potential for widespread job displacement, as
robots
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 increasingly replace human workers in various sectors.
This
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 is evident in the automotive industry, where automation has significantly reduced the demand for manual
labor
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labour
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.
Furthermore
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, ethical concerns regarding the autonomy of
robots
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 and their potential misuse in areas like warfare
further
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 underscore their risks.
While
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 these concerns highlight valid drawbacks, it is important to weigh these issues against the broader societal benefits. In conclusion,
while
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 the perspective that
robots
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 pose a threat has its merits and highlights crucial concerns, from my perspective, the belief in their importance for human development is the more
favorable
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favourable
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 option. The presented evidence strongly suggests that the positive impact of
robots
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, particularly in innovation and efficiency, outweighs their potential drawbacks.
However
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, the persuasiveness of
this
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 opinion ultimately rests upon the unique perspectives and interpretations of individual readers.

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task achievement
Ensure that the discussion of both perspectives is evenly balanced to provide a complete response to the prompt.
task achievement
Include more varied examples to support the argument for considering robots as a threat to give a more comprehensive view.
task achievement
Try to conclude the essay by addressing the importance of managing the risks to fully embrace the advantages of robotic advancement.
coherence cohesion
Use a linking phrase or sentence to transition between the discussion of the two perspectives for smoother coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and concise introduction that outlines the task and purpose effectively.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure was maintained throughout the essay, with clear paragraphs dedicated to both views.
task achievement
Specific examples, like the impact of robots in healthcare, were effectively used to support claims.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively reiterates the writer's stance, providing a strong ending to the discussion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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