IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some feel that tourism endangers culture while others feel it is beneficial. DIscuss both sides and give your own opinion.

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In the contemporary
world
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, many
people
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 like to travel and visit beautiful places across the
world
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. Certain groups of
people
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 believe that
this
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 trend is a danger to a
culture
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while
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 others say that it is beneficial. I agree with
this
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 statement and in the following paragraphs, I shall discuss both viewpoints and give reasons for
this
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 belief. On the one hand, the authorities are trying to impose some rules and regulations on the tourist because their actions are responsible for the environmental degradation and cultural heritage.
Firstly
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, many visitors dump their garbage on a historic site which not only pollutes local areas but
also
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 causes damage to the old monuments.
As a result
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,
People
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 will lose the historical importance of their
culture
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 in
this
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 process.
Secondly
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,
People
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 bring their own
culture
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, tradition and food to a tourist location which motivates local vendors to sell souvenirs of different varieties from all over the
world
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.
On the other hand
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, I believe that these visitors contribute to the local economy. When there is a holiday season,
people
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 like to travel all around the
world
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 which brings a lot of revenue to host aircraft countries as they are charging extra money because their flights are in great demand. When individuals reach their desired locations they are motivated to try foreign foods and traditional meals which help local
people
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 to earn extra money.
However
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, it is true that outsiders disturb natural habitats which can cause damage to local
culture
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.
To conclude
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, It is evident that
people
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 from other countries are responsible for the environment
along with
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 damage to historical sites.
However
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, these visitors purchase a lot of stuff from the local shopkeepers which helps
people
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 to become financially stable. It is a win-win situation for both the local community and tourists.

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introduction conclusion present
Try to make the introduction clearer about your stance. While you agree with the statement, it's important to specify which side you lean towards more strongly or if you have a balanced view.
logical structure
Make an effort to link ideas more seamlessly within and between paragraphs. Using connectors like 'for instance' or 'in addition' can help improve flow.
relevant specific examples
Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points. This will enhance the clarity and relevance of your essay, making it more compelling.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your discussion well.
complete response
You have managed to cover both sides of the argument, helping fulfill the task effectively.
supported main points
Your essay brings a practical perspective on how tourism can impact the local economy, which is a well-considered point.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural erosion
  • cultural homogenization
  • cultural heritage
  • mutual understanding
  • cultural diversity
  • preservation
  • economic incentive
  • revival
  • authenticity
  • over-commercialized
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