IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In some societies, more and more people choose to live on their own. What are the reasons people choose to do this? Is it a positive or negative trend?

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One
Use synonyms
 school of thought holds that individuals want to live on their own, but it will bring a variety of negative effects for them.
This
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 essay attempts to shed light on both the merits and demerits of
this
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 tendency before concluding that the latter is more significant. On the
one
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 hand, populations that opt to live freely the way they want are disadvantageous to some extent.
Firstly
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, all the responsibilities of the household lie on
one
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's own shoulders if they are living by themselves.
For example
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, they need to double down in their job to earn a decent salary, which helps them to pay for the cost of living,
such
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 as accommodations, bills, and food.
Secondly
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, sometimes, they can feel upset and alone without loved ones.
For instance
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, it could
also
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 lead to social isolation, loneliness, and less familial or communal support during challenging times.
On the other hand
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, there are a host of compelling reasons as to why I am convinced that people choosing to live alone play a vital role in life.
One
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 rationale is that they can pursue greater independence and personal freedom.
This
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 is because living alone allows individuals to make decisions without the need for compromise and offers the freedom to structure their lives as they can fix. On the positive side, living alone can promote self-reliance, personal growth, and mental well-being.
However
Linking Words
, on the negative side, it could
also
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 lead to social isolation, loneliness, and less familial or communal support during challenging times. In conclusion,
while
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 it is irrefutable that people
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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living alone will meet some difficulties, I would contend that it is a positive choice as it would make individuals learn to take
responsibilities
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responsibility
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.

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to substantiate your points. For instance, mention specific scenarios or data when discussing the disadvantages or advantages of living alone. This would strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to use consistent terminology or phraseology to maintain clarity and cohesion. For example, avoid repetition such as repeating both positive and negative aspects in the same paragraph. This will enhance the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively summarize the main points of the essay.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced view by discussing both the merits and demerits of living alone.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally clear, with a distinct separation of the different arguments and a good flow from one point to the next.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • solitude
  • autonomy
  • independence
  • individualism
  • self-reliance
  • personal growth
  • social isolation
  • financial independence
  • cultural changes
  • career-focused lifestyles
  • mental respite
  • personal preferences
  • economic growth
  • technological advancements
  • communal support
  • social connections
  • housing market
  • real estate demand
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