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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.
#show #changes #ownership #appliances #amount #time #housework #households #country
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The charts display data about the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and how much time was spent doing
housework
Use synonyms
 in
household
Add an article
the household
a household
show examples
 in
specific
Add an article
the specific
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 from 1920 to 2019
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen from the charts that
number
Change the article
the number
show examples
 of
hours
Use synonyms
 of
housework
Use synonyms
 decreased over the given period.
However
Linking Words
,
proportion
Add an article
the proportion
show examples
 of ownership households with electrical devices increased between 1920 and 2019. People who owned refrigerators increased dramatically from 1920 to 1960 and reached around 90
percent
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, 20 years later there was a slight rise to 100
percent
Use synonyms
.
Household
Fix the agreement mistake
Households
show examples
 who used vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
 in 1920
there
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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were around 30
percent
Use synonyms
 after that there was a moderate
rose
Replace the word
rise
show examples
 until achieving its peak in 2000 and 2019 with 100
percent
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, washing machine owners
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
were approximately 40
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 1920
then
Linking Words
 there was a fluctuation
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1940 to 2000 with no less than 60
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and no higher than 70
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Then
Linking Words
 19 years later there was a slight increase. People used to
spent
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spend
show examples
 time doing
housework
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 like washing clothes and cleaning in 1920 with around 50
hours
Use synonyms
 per week.
This
Linking Words
 time decreased over 40 years later to 20
hours
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 per week and continued to
dropping
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drop
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 until reached about 10
hours
Use synonyms
 per week
spending
Change the form of the verb
spent
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
housework
Use synonyms
 in 2019.
Submitted by m.ixi6006 on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words housework, hours, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • electrical appliances
  • housework
  • time frame
  • variables
  • trends
  • significant milestones
  • turning points
  • correlation
  • reduction
  • influenced
  • societal implications
  • quality of life
  • gender roles
  • economic implications
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