IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

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Society in some countries thinks having a home is more crucial than renting it. The prices that keep increasing over the years considerably become the reason to buy the residence as fast as possible. Meanwhile,
this
Linking Words
 notion should be seen as a negative as nowadays, the public
have
Change the verb form
has
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 a mobile life related to their work. Indeed, owning a private house earlier could be a benefit for life.
While
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 don't need to spend money regularly for the rent, they have
a
Correct article usage
the
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 freedom to do whatever things on their own, focusing only on decorating the house either indoors or outdoors with tastes by themselves.
However
Linking Words
, with so much information about the impact of globalisation,
people
Use synonyms
 could move to another region suddenly depending on their other priorities and leave their
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
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. A house could be a burden when
people
Use synonyms
 easily move depending on their better chances. Nowadays, many job vacancies provide better
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
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 and work environments.
People
Use synonyms
 have a lot of job options they would like to do beyond their permanent residence before.
For instance
Linking Words
, a civil engineer often worked for a long time. After they
finished
Wrong verb form
finish
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 one project in some location, they could move to another one either in their new or old company. Employees who get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new opportunities
of
Change preposition
to
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 work would spend
much
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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money
for
Change preposition
on
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 their new accommodation if they had bought
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 permanent
resident
Replace the word
residence
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. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 think having a home is more significant than renting it,
this
Linking Words
 notion should be seen as a negative as
people
Use synonyms
 have high movement related to their better chances of life.

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task achievement
To enhance task achievement, ensure clarity in the development of your ideas. Providing more specific examples can strengthen your essay.
coherence cohesion
In coherence and cohesion, work on making transitions between ideas smoother for better flow.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are evident and effectively frame your arguments.
task achievement
The essay covers both pros and cons of owning a home, addressing the task response comprehensively.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure is maintained with clear paragraphs and supportive points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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