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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

A number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans are superior and entitled to employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including food and research. Discuss both these options and form your own opinion.

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The importance of harming
animals
Use synonyms
 by humans for the purpose of research and food consumption has always been debatable with many people claiming that freedom and the right to live are equal rights of creatures
while
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 others reject
this
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 notion. The substantial influence of
this
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 trend has sparked controversy over its potential influence in recent years. In my opinion, the former proposition appears to be more rational.
This
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 essay will
further
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 elaborate on both perspectives and
thus
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 will lead to a logical conclusion. There are myriad reasons which will
further
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 explain
this
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 argument, but the most preponderant one stems from the fact that many medical research and innovations are pursued with the help of the lab rat, experiments on
animals
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 foster diagnostic accuracy and alleviate medical industry. Another striking reason in
this
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 regard is that doctors and scientists prescribe non-vegetarian diets containing excessive amounts of protein to patients which accelerates accidental recovery.
Hence
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, it is apparent why many are in favour of
this
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 trend.
Furthermore
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, there are some pitfalls that negate these arguments which can certainly overwhelm the potential influence earth is the home of all the species and creatures authorized an equal right to live, numerous
animals
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 and birds are instinct by unjustified activities performed by humans, modern law offers equal benefits and protection to the
animals
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,
this
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 policy imposing strict punishment on individuals who abused
animals
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 for their own benefits.
Besides
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, many nations protect
animals
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 and even worship them, because they believe that species are precious parts of the motherland and maintain a balance of the environment with the help of the reproduction process. To recapitulate,
according to
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 the arguments and aforementioned, I reach the conclusion that the benefits of employing
animals
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 for medical experiments and the fast recovery of patients are indeed too great.
Nevertheless
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, its potential right to live and its availability to improve environmental health should not be overlooked either.

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relevant specific examples
To strengthen your essay, use specific examples to support your points. For instance, mention a specific medical breakthrough achieved through animal research or a specific case where a vegetarian diet benefited a patient's recovery.
logical structure
While your ideas are clear, attempt to link your paragraphs with better transitions to improve the logical flow. This will enhance the coherence of your essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion are well-presented and clearly outline the main points of your essay.
complete response
You have effectively presented both sides of the argument, showcasing a balanced perspective before stating your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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