Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Is this a positive or negative development

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These days the way
people
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communicate with each other has experienced a lot of changes because of
technology
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.
Due to
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the advancement of
technology
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,
people
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generally make virtual
relationships
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and the
relationships
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they make have a lack of depth. I personally think that it is a negative development because connection among
people
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has decreased because of
technology
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.
People
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generally develop virtual
relationships
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. They do not make real-life connections with others because the
relationships
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people
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make virtually
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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lack
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
interaction.
In addition
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, the
relationships
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people
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make nowadays have a lack of depth.
People
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have a lot of virtual friends,
however
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, they do not have a real one by their side in tough
time
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times
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.
For instance
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, in Australia, many adolescents have plenty of friends
in
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on
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Facebook,
however
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, they do not have anyone to share their feelings and sufferings when they
nevigate
Correct your spelling
navigate
a challenging phase. I personally believe that the
relationships
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people
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make
is
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are
show examples
not real because they do not have anyone by their side when they are in danger. The
bondings
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bonding
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between
people
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have declined because of
technology
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.
People
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have become
self-centered
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self-centred
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and do not care about others nowadays. Because they do not feel about
others
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others'
other's
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wellbeing
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well-being
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and safety.
For instance
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, in India,
people
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have a lot of virtual friends,
however
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, the rate of suicide is very high among
people
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because they do not have any trusted person to share their feelings when they need
.
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to.
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In conclusion, because of the advancement of
technology
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,
people
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primarily make virtual
relationships
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, and those
relationships
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do not have much depth.
This
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is a negative development because these
relationships
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do not help when they are in danger.

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coherence cohesion
Try to develop paragraphs with clear topic sentences and supporting details to enhance logical structure.
task achievement
Ensure that all main points are thoroughly supported with relevant examples for a stronger argument.
task achievement
Provide a balanced examination by acknowledging positive impacts of technology-related developments, if applicable.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a solid structure for the response.
task achievement
The writer has included specific examples like the situation in Australia and India to illustrate points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Interact
  • Social media platforms
  • Networking
  • Instant messaging
  • Face-to-face interaction
  • Misunderstandings
  • Emotional context
  • Superficial connections
  • Deceptive identities
  • Privacy concerns
  • Social skills
  • Video calls
  • Online presence
  • Digital communication
  • Cyber relationships
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