Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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Some

children

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stay online on their devices for unlimited hours.

This

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essay will discuss some of the reasons for

this

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phenomenon and will explain why I think it is a negative development. On the one hand,

Children

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feel bored most of the

time

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after school hours because the majority of them are not involved in any after-school

activities

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or clubs.

Moreover

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, when they are home they have nothing to do apart from staying online.

For example

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, research has shown that primary students who have no

activities

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after school tend to spend longer

time

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online compared to their peers who attend any type of

activities

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. Another reason for

this

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trend is the lack of parents' attention,

such

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as spending extra

time

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at work or working longer hours. Meaning that they get home tired unable to track down their

children

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and what they are doing during the day.Because they want to rest.

However

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this

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makes them vulnerable to any strangers who are using the internet to reach out to them without their parents.

As a result

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, I strongly believe it is a negative development. There is a significant link between screen

time

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and behavioural issues as well because when juniors spend

time

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online they are exposed to a variety of media materials that are sometimes harmful to them. In conclusion, Young

children

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have a bad habit of being online on a daily basis,

due to

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Borden's feelings that some of them may have,

Also

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, Some are left unwatched which

emphasize

Verb problem

forces

show examples

them to carry out online

activities

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because their parents are busy or tired.

As a result

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, I strongly think it is a negative development

hebadyalaMon Feb 03 2025

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task achievement

Consider providing a clearer introduction that outlines the main points you will discuss in your essay to enhance the overall structure and flow.

task achievement

Try to expand on your points with more specific examples and details; this can strengthen your argument and improve the clarity of your ideas.

coherence and cohesion

Pay attention to grammar and punctuation, as improving these aspects can enhance the readability of your essay.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to clearly link your paragraphs and ideas to improve the cohesion of your writing, such as using transition phrases.

task achievement

The essay addresses the topic appropriately and presents a clear viewpoint, which is a strong aspect of task achievement.

coherence and cohesion

The use of specific reasons to support your argument showcases good critical thinking and helps convey your message effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think the government should support artists like painters, musicians, and poets, while others believe this wastes money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is positive or negative development?

Climate change is a significant issue that requires urgent attention. What are the primary causes of climate change? How can individuals and governments work together to address this issue?

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school Program (for example working for a charity, Improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Government spend a lot of money on education. More money should be spent on free time activities. To what extent do agree or disagree?