IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

People living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. What are those problems? Should the government encourage people to move to regional towns? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no doubt that living in big cities has positive and negative sides, and there are several issues individuals have to counter. Some of these issues are traffic congestion and high cost of living.
Therefore
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 essay will discuss these problems and a possible solution about whether governments should motivate
people
Use synonyms
 to transform into the countryside.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, traffic congestion is one of the critical obstacles
people
Use synonyms
 who live in large cities face in their daily lives, especially in the peak hours and on special occasions,
such
Linking Words
 as school and work hours, and football matches.
This
Linking Words
 issue has a negative impact on
people
Use synonyms
’s lives, arriving at work late and losing their time waiting in their cars.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the cost of hosting, eating, and other necessities in these cities is considered to be high, which places a financial burden on those
people
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, living in New York City requires
people
Use synonyms
 to have a stable financial state, as its expenses are too high.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the possible solution for these problems is government should encourage those
people
Use synonyms
 who face these issues to move to rural
areas
Use synonyms
, as living in these
areas
Use synonyms
 has many benefits , but it
also
Linking Words
 has multiple drawbacks. These benefits include fewer expenses to incur, so
people
Use synonyms
 will be able to save money, and have financial stability.
Additionally
Linking Words
, they will be able to get rid of overcrowding stress, enabling them to allocate their time properly.
However
Linking Words
, these
areas
Use synonyms
 have faced a shortage of needed facilities, and limited job opportunities.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they might not be attractive
areas
Use synonyms
 to live in.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Expand on the conclusion to summarize the main points and provide a clear stance on whether the government should encourage movement to rural areas.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs for better coherence. Use linking words or phrases to connect ideas clearly.
task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples or data to support your claims, particularly about the benefits of moving to rural areas.
task achievement
Identifies and discusses relevant problems faced by urban residents such as traffic congestion and high living costs.
task achievement
Provides a balanced view by mentioning both advantages and disadvantages of moving to rural areas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • urban congestion
  • traffic jams
  • lengthy commutes
  • high cost of living
  • financial strain
  • air pollution
  • noise pollution
  • quality of life
  • green space
  • recreational areas
  • social isolation
  • fast-paced lifestyle
  • public services strain
  • overpopulation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: