In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food . To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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In recent years, a growing number of individuals have experienced health issues linked to the excessive consumption of fast
food
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. Some argue that governments should impose higher taxes on
such
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products to address
this
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concern. I fully agree with
this
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view, as it would help reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
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diet-related diseases and promote
a healthier eating
Correct the article-noun agreement
healthier eating habits
a healthier eating habit
show examples
habits
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.
Firstly
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, fast
food
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consumption is a leading cause of many health conditions, including obesity, heart disease, and diabetes. These illnesses place a significant financial burden on
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
healthcare
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system
For example
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, in many countries, a large part of
healthcare
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spending goes toward treating illnesses that could be avoided with better eating
habits
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. By raising taxes on unhealthy
food
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, governments can encourage people to eat less of it, and
as a result
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,
this
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would lower the demand for fast
food
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.
Moreover
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, it would reduce pressure on
healthcare
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systems and ultimately help create a healthier society.
Secondly
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, making fast
food
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more expensive could influence people to rethink their eating
habits
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. When prices rise, consumers are more likely to consider healthier and more affordable alternatives.
For example
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, In countries where unhealthy drinks were taxed, people began buying them less often, leading to improved health outcomes.
Similarly
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, applying
this
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method to fast
food
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could encourage individuals to switch to healthier meal options. In conclusion, I strongly believe that increasing taxes on fast
food
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is an essential step.
This
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action would help lower the consumption of unhealthy foods and,
consequently
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, reduce the number of illnesses caused by poor eating
habits
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.
Furthermore
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, it would encourage healthier living and ease the financial strain on
healthcare
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systems.

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your arguments, particularly in the second body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that the transition between ideas is smooth and that each paragraph logically leads to the next, enhancing overall flow.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear position on the topic and maintains a consistent argument throughout.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-structured, summarizing the main points effectively.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Overconsumption
  • Chronic diseases
  • Obesity
  • Diabetes
  • Cardiovascular health
  • Sin tax
  • Subsidize
  • Affordability
  • Nutritional awareness
  • Paternalism
  • Socio-economic disparities
  • Industry lobbying
  • Public health initiatives
  • Consumer behavior
  • Regulatory measures
  • Health-conscious
  • Processed foods
  • Fiscal policy
  • Preventative healthcare
  • Behavioral economics
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