Competitive sports have been argued to have a positive effect on child education by some, while others oppose to. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the modern era, the issue of influencing competitive

sports

Use synonyms

on child education has become highly controversial. There are those who say that competitive

sports

Use synonyms

have positive effects on child education.

However

Linking Words

, others say that competitive

sports

Use synonyms

have negative impacts. In

this

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essay, I will examine both sides of

Correct article usage

the arguments

show examples

arguments

Fix the agreement mistake

argument

show examples

and provide my

overall

Linking Words

opinions. Generally speaking, there are two main reasons why people believe that competitive

sports

Use synonyms

have positive effects on child education. Perhaps, the main reason why people are in favour of

this

Linking Words

phenomenon is that playing competitive

sports

Use synonyms

games

foster

Correct subject-verb agreement

fosters

show examples

children

Use synonyms

to broaden their physical abilities. A good illustration of

this

Linking Words

is that

children

Use synonyms

challenge

thier

Correct your spelling

their

physical movements to enhance better performances in soccer games, until

duration

Add an article

the duration

show examples

of the

game

Use synonyms

, resulting in the long run developing healthier cardiovascular, as well. A

further

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point in favour of supporting positive

effect

Fix the agreement mistake

effects

show examples

is that

children

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can learn the importance of fairness and

sense

Correct article usage

a sense

show examples

of cooperation in competitive

sports

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, the shared goals to win the

game

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lead all team members to one team, supporting peers to win the

game

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and keeping rules not to get the warning cards. Despite these challenges, there are those who say that competitive

sports

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have negative impacts

Change preposition

show examples

children

Use synonyms

. First and foremost, competitive

sports

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always result

to lose

Change preposition

in losing

show examples

teams, which means half of

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children

Correct article usage

the children

show examples

players will face feelings of sadness and frustration.

Additionally

Linking Words

, these feelings degrade the motivation

of enjoying

Change preposition

to enjoy

show examples

sports

Use synonyms

, and

then

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

will never join

Use synonyms

Correct article usage

the game

show examples

game

Fix the agreement mistake

games

show examples

freely.

Secondly

Linking Words

over -competitive

Correct your spelling

over-competitive

show examples

sports

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make

children

Use synonyms

get injured easily, despite severe pains, but they endure and hide them to participate

Use synonyms

Change preposition

in game

show examples

game

Fix the agreement mistake

games

show examples

Considered

Wrong verb form

Considering

show examples

that

children

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are still growing, their continuous injuries will become a barrier to

grow

Wrong verb form

growing

show examples

properly. In conclusion,

this

Linking Words

is a topic which is very relevant to present and future generations. In

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

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circumstances, I fully agree that competitive

sports

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will provide better opportunities to

devlop physcial

Correct your spelling

develop physical

skills and give a sense of achievement to

children

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too. Provided that

children

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cannot experience any competitive situations in advance, they will lose

chance

Add an article

the chance

a chance

show examples

to evolve, which in turn leading

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of ability of

resillience

Correct your spelling

resilience

0729eeThu Feb 06 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Consider using clearer linking words or phrases to guide readers through your arguments. This will strengthen the logical flow of your essay.

task achievement

Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supporting sentences that directly relate to that idea. This will enhance the clarity of your arguments.

language accuracy

Be cautious with spelling and grammatical inaccuracies, as they can distract from your main points. Proofreading can help catch these errors before submission.

task achievement

Your essay tackles a relevant and important topic, demonstrating an understanding of the complexities surrounding competitive sports and child education.

task achievement

You did well in presenting arguments from both sides, showing a balanced perspective on the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

348 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

competitive sports
positive effect
child education
physical fitness
overall well-being
academic performance
life skills
teamwork
discipline
time management
motivation
balance
scholarships
admission
pressure to perform
mental health
self-esteem
burnout
educational experience
rivalry
learning environment

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Competitive sports have been argued to have a positive effect on child education by some, while others oppose to. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In many countries, children show less respect to elders. What are the causes of such behaviour? What can be done to address this situation?

These days, people work in more than one job, and often change career several times during their life. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Some people say that the technology advancement enables people to entertain at home. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?