Some people believe that women should play an equal role as Men in a country's police force or military force, such as the army, while others think women are not suitable for this kind of jobs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The debate over whether
women
should play an equal role as men in a country
's police force or military force is a contentious and complex issue that elicits strong opinions on both sides.
Supporters of gender
equality argue that women
are just as capable as men of performing the duties required in law enforcement and the military. They emphasize that gender
should not be a determining factor in someone's ability to serve and protect their country
. Furthermore
, they point to the importance of diversity within these institutions, as having a mix of perspectives and experiences can enhance effectiveness and improve decision-making.
On the other hand
, opponents of women
serving in these roles often cite physical differences between men and women
, suggesting that women
may not possess the same level of strength or endurance required for certain tasks, especially in combat situations. There are concerns about women
's safety and their ability to perform under high-pressure and physically demanding conditions. Additionally
, some argue that the inclusion of women
could disrupt unit cohesion and morale within military units.
In my opinion, women
should have equal opportunities to serve in law enforcement and the military, provided they meet the same standards and qualifications as their male counterparts. It is crucial to focus on individual capabilities and merit rather than making blanket assumptions based on gender
. With proper training, support, and resources, women
can excel in these roles and contribute meaningfully to their country
's security and defense
. Change the spelling
defence
Moreover
, promoting gender
diversity in these institutions can lead to more inclusive and effective outcomes, benefiting society as a whole. Ultimately, gender
should not be a barrier to pursuing a career in law enforcement or the military, and all individuals should have the opportunity to serve their country
based on their abilities and dedication.Submitted by safia-93s on
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Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, make sure to provide more concrete and specific examples that directly support your arguments. This will make your points more persuasive and compelling.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider linking your ideas more clearly by using a wider variety of linking words and phrases. This will help improve the flow of your essay and make your argumentation stronger.
Coherence and Cohesion
For a higher score in coherence and cohesion, work on structuring your paragraphs in a way that each one focuses on a single main idea. Use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to signal what the paragraph will be about.
Coherence and Cohesion
In the introduction and conclusion, try to be more concise and focused on the essay question. Present your thesis more clearly in the introduction and summarize your main points more effectively in the conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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