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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some areas of the United States, a curfew is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult . What is your opinion about this?

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After a curfew imposed by the United States, it is highly restricted by the government that teenagers cannot go outdoors after a particular time without the company of adults.
According to
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 my viewpoint,
this
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 curfew is advantageous for both parents and their kids, which will be explained in the following paragraphs with relevant reasons and examples. Restricted the teens from going outside after a specific time leads to safety and security for them, as it is dangerous to go outside even after 10:00 pm, nobody has an idea when mishappen can happen
such
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 as robberies, kidnappings, sexual assaults and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
trend of these crimes are on peak point at
this
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 moment, which always make fearful to the citizens create the panic environment in the nation. In a case study held by the United States in 2011, every other citizen got robbed just because they used to commute to work at night after 10:00 pm,
along with
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 it, the majority of the sufferers were youngsters.
Hence
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, regulations maintained by America are
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
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 for the inhabitants.
Secondly
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, teenage is very crucial for adolescents, it makes their
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 not only mischievous, rebellious, and irritable, but
also
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 changes their minds from innocent to immoral. Giving freedom to the youngsters going outside after a particular time will let them enjoy other things like having a boyfriend or girlfriend, going to clubs late at night, and narcotic habits and these habits destroy not only their health and mental well-being but
also
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 distract them from their studies,
as a result
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, it is just demolishing their careers.
To conclude
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, the lockout maintained by the US States is very effective for people to get rid of crimes
as well as
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 for a safer and brighter future for the kids.

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structure
The introduction could better outline the main points that will be discussed in the essay to provide clearer guidance to the reader.
structure
Ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that reflects the main idea of that paragraph.
content
Provide more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your arguments, especially in the second paragraph.
language
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary and grammatical structures to enhance the sophistication of your writing.
content
The essay addresses an important and relevant topic, showcasing a clear opinion on the matter.
content
You have made a solid effort to present arguments both for the safety of teenagers and the potential negative influences of late-night activities.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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