IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is to make vehicle drivers to take a test every year. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued that to improve road safety
people
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 have to take a driver's
test
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 annually ,as it is the best method . In my opinion , I strongly disagree with the statement .
To begin
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 with , forcing
people
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 who drive their vehicles, to have an exam each year , is an unsuccessful approach to guaranteeing a safe road .
That is
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 because of several reasons , one of them is it may lead to reduce the number of those who want to have a car and
as a result
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in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
public transport might be busy and unavailable every day , which creates a new problem . A good example of that was a survey that asked many
people
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 about their opinion that a
test
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 per year is a good way to feel safe when they drive in the street , 70 per cent of them said it is a useless idea .
Moreover
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, it might be putting pressure on the institutions to handle an enormous amount of folk every year .
In addition
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, it seems impossible to implement
this
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 method in a big city , to clarify
this
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 point , a large city
such
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 as London and Morocco has a large population , if we assume that millions of
people
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 want to take the
test
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 , the place where they do the
test
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 it would not be able to deal with the whole
people
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, even if there are many areas to do the
test
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 .
therefore
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 making
this
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 approach for everyone is just wasting time and effort.
To sum up
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 ,
while
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 it is important that a safe road has to be discussed as a serious issue ,
however
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 , I believe
this
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 view could not address the problem effectively and not achieve excellent outcomes

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task achievement
Consider revising your introduction to present a clearer thesis statement. Clearly state your position and the main points you will discuss.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and sufficient supporting details. For instance, expand on why the testing approach might deter people from driving.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid using overly complex sentences that may obscure your ideas. Aim for clarity and simplicity in expression.
task achievement
You presented a clear opinion that is easy to identify, which is important for task achievement.
coherence and cohesion
Your use of examples within the body paragraphs helps to illustrate your points, contributing to overall clarity.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • road safety
  • vehicle drivers
  • take a test
  • up-to-date
  • rules and regulations
  • driving skills
  • identify
  • issues
  • problems
  • financially burdensome
  • behavior on the road
  • performance in a test
  • road infrastructure
  • enforcement of traffic laws
  • accompany
  • measures
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