IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that robots are very important for the future of human development, while others believe that they are dangerous and have a negative impact on society. Discuss both perspectives and give your opinion

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Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
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,
roborts
Correct your spelling
robots
 are
the
Correct article usage
a
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 major concern among people. Some
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
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 think that they are good for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society,
however
Linking Words
, opponents believe that they are
hazardious
Correct your spelling
hazardous
 for humans.
Linking Words
Further
Add a comma
Further,
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i
Change the capitalization
I
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 will discuss both views and my opinion regarding
this
Linking Words
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
first
Add an article
the first
a first
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 and foremost advantage is significant growth in
productio
Correct your spelling
production

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task achievement
Your introduction gives a good overview, but ensure to use standard spelling and grammar (e.g. 'Nowadays' instead of 'Nowdays', 'robots' instead of 'roborts'). Structural clarity is key; consider rephrasing for better readability.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay would benefit from clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader through your thoughts. Remember to summarize both perspectives effectively before presenting your own opinion in a clear statement at the end.
task achievement
You have identified clear perspectives on the topic, which is vital for task achievement.
coherence and cohesion
You attempt to provide a discussion of both viewpoints, which demonstrates an understanding of diverse perspectives.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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