IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

There has been some controversy about the practise of companies in wealthy countries outsourcing labour to countries where wages are lower. What do you think are the disadvantage and advantages of this practise? Support your opinion with reasons and examples from your own knowledge and experiance

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In recent years, a lot of
companies
Use synonyms
 relocated to countries where people are paid relatively less. Individuals hold opposite opinions regarding
this
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 practice.
This
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 essay will discuss both
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
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 and disadvantages of
this
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 phenomenon. Moving
companies
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 to
enconomic
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economic
disadvantage
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disadvantaged
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 countries
brings
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bring
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 benefits to not only the
compaies
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companies
 but
also
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 to the local development. With less money distributed to the payment of staff and workers,
companies
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 can provide sufficient investment in product upgrading, designing, and satisfactory services for customers, leading to increased sales and higher profits.
Additionally
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,
companies
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 create job opportunities, which often promotes local economic prosperity.
Accroding
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According
 to a report completed by the government, the jobless rate dropped by 1% in Shanghai, and the number of cars sold increased by 20% within just 6 months.
However
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,
companies
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 outsourcing labour
also
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 comes with negative consequences. On a large scale,
less
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fewer
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 job opportunities are available in the host country, which often leads to higher jobless
rate
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rates
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 and economic
downturn
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downturns
show examples
.
Moreover
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,
companies
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 face challenges in quality control and
maintain
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maintaining
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 appropriate services as the products are processed in another country.
This
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 potentially leads to customer
unsatisfaction
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dissatisfaction
show examples
, which impacts
companies
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 in the
long-term
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long term
show examples
. In conclusion, even though outsourcing cheaper labour is
benefical
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beneficial
 for
companies
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 since more
fundings
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funding
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 are used in improving the products and services,
however
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, we can not neglect the disadvantages
such
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 as the higher unemployment rates in the host country and challenges in quality control.

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language
Ensure you proofread your essay for spelling errors (e.g., ‘economic’, ‘companies’, ‘unemployment’). These small mistakes can distract from your argument.
content
Try to develop your main points further with additional details or examples to strengthen your arguments and provide a more comprehensive analysis.
cohesion
Aim for smoother transitions between paragraphs to improve the flow of your essay. Consider linking sentences that summarize previous points before introducing new ideas.
content
You provide a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of outsourcing, showcasing your ability to consider multiple perspectives.
example
The use of a specific example regarding Shanghai effectively illustrates your point, making your argument more persuasive and relevant.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • controversy
  • outsource
  • labour
  • wealthy countries
  • lower wages
  • disadvantage
  • advantage
  • practice
  • support
  • opinion
  • reasons
  • examples
  • cost savings
  • specialized skills
  • expertise
  • efficiency
  • productivity
  • global integration
  • economic development
  • job creation
  • job losses
  • exploitation
  • low-wage countries
  • quality control
  • customer satisfaction
  • cultural knowledge
  • industry knowledge
  • negative impact
  • local economy
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