Adults do less exercise nowadays. Some think that people can be encouraged to live healthy lives through sporting events such as the Olympics or the World Cup. Others think that there are better ways to encourage adults to exercise. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

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In current society, many
people
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have
health
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problems
due to
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of
exercise
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. Some
people
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insist that
sports
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events
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enhance the
overall
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health
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of individuals,
while
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others state that other ways should be used to encourage adults to
exercise
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. From my point of view, the benefits of daily
exercise
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outweighs
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outweigh
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the occasional
sports
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events
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.
To begin
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with, it is imperative to work out frequently. By exercising every day, humans'
bodies
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adapt to the new environment and start burning fat and strengthening muscles. In
this
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way,
people
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can get healthy
bodies
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. In order to
exercise
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daily, the good options would be light exercises including walking and jogging.
For example
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, one research study indicates that
people
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engaged in daily jogging have better BMI scores than those who participated in the
Olympics
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Olympic
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games four years ago.
This
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implies that continuous efforts are important for
maintainig
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maintaining
good
health
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in
a
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the
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long term. Certainly, I admit that
sports
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competitions
such
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as the Olympics and the World Cup provide
people
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with motivation for exercising. Many young
people
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join
the
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apply
show examples
sports
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clubs and engage in many
sports
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such
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as soccer, basketball, and tennis with dreams
to participate
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of participating
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in professional competitions one day. Even mothers and fathers get motivated to play
sports
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after watching
sports
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matches on TV. These
sports
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events
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,
however
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, take place only once a year or once in four years.
People
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can easily skip the
sports
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practises and forget about taking care of their
bodies
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once the competition is over.
Therefore
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, more daily activities are suitable from
the
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a
show examples
health
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perspective.
To sum up
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,
while
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occasional
sports
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events
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provide adults with motivation for exercising, I strongly believe that daily
exercise
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is more efficient to build healthy
bodies
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.

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Task Achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to strongly support your arguments, particularly regarding daily exercise. This will enhance the persuasiveness of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that all points made in the essay are fully developed. The paragraph about sports events could include more detailed analysis of the potential downsides of relying solely on them for motivation.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction clearly states your opinion and outlines the main points of discussion, which sets a good stage for the essay.
Task Achievement
You have effectively conveyed the importance of daily exercise, which is a strong point in your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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