“Many people find it hard to balance their work with other parts of their lives. What are the reasons for this? How can this problem be overcome?”

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One of the most important

part

Change to a plural noun

parts

show examples

of people’s

life

Use synonyms

is their

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

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. It represents the aim of their existence and reflects their personality. It is a reality that some of them are incapable

to balance

Change preposition

of balancing

show examples

their work with other parts of their lives.

This

Linking Words

essay will examine the reasons for

this

Linking Words

and what might be the solutions to overcome

this

Linking Words

problem. There are several causes that could explain why individuals usually struggle to balance between their jobs and everything else around them,

such

Linking Words

as favourite hobbies and social events. First of all, the nature of their work might affect the quality of their

life

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, doctors spend long working hours in the hospital with minimum

time

Use synonyms

to rest or sleep during their shift,

in addition

Linking Words

to the stressful environment. As a

consequences

Correct the article-noun agreement

consequence

show examples

, they could have depression and

burn out

Correct your spelling

burnout

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Moreover

Linking Words

, lack of

time

Use synonyms

management skills.

Therefore

Linking Words

time

Use synonyms

and energy will be wasted without recognition.

Last

Linking Words

but not least,

in addition

Linking Words

to the mentioned reasons, randomisation in performing daily tasks at work is another reason to be aware of. Being successful in both

the

Change the word

show examples

personal

life

Use synonyms

as well as

Linking Words

professional career is hard.

However

Linking Words

, it is not impossible. There are many strategies to adopt in order to find the balance and be efficient. Without any doubt, prioritisation is very important since nobody will be able to satisfy everyone.

Next,

Linking Words

learning

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

time

Use synonyms

management skills is vital to be mindful and use every second wisely.

Finally

Linking Words

, establishing a clear action plan is key, using planners or

timetable

Fix the agreement mistake

timetables

show examples

. These are all invaluable concepts. In conclusion,

due to

Linking Words

the

fast-based

Correct your spelling

fast-paced

show examples

life

Use synonyms

, being able to achieve excellence

every

Change preposition

in every

show examples

aspect of people’s

Use synonyms

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

is a real challenge. Certain ways are available and easy to utilise in order to achieve

this

Linking Words

goal.

alfredSun Feb 16 2025

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task achievement

Consider providing more concrete examples to illustrate your points, especially in the body paragraphs. Adding statistics or studies can strengthen your argument.

coherence

Be mindful of sentence structures and grammar to enhance clarity. Sentences like 'As a consequences' should be corrected to 'As a consequence'.

coherence

Ensure that your ideas flow logically from one to the next. Try using transitional phrases to connect your thoughts more clearly.

structure

You have a clear introduction and conclusion that outline the main problem and potential solutions.

task achievement

Your essay addresses both parts of the question effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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“Many people find it hard to balance their work with other parts of their lives. What are the reasons for this? How can this problem be overcome?”

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each orther. Others argue that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some place, old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people say that there is too much harmful content on the internet. They say the only way to make the internet safe is for the government to censor the content of websites. To what extent do you think the government should control what information is available on the internet?

Throughout history, male leaders often made society more violent and conflicting. If women governed the world, the world would be more peaceful. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?