IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Course and general online study have recently become very popular. However, some people still prefer to attend classes in person. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some people have differing opinions on whether online or
offline
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 courses are more beneficial for
students
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.
While
Linking Words
 online learning allows
students
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 to manage their
time
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 more efficiently and focus solely on studying, it may negatively impact
students
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 who are accustomed to face-to-face interactions.
Conversely
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, traditional
offline
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 learning fosters direct social engagement, helping
students
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 adapt to various environments. On the one hand, online learning can make
students
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' schedules more efficient.
For instance
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, in the morning,
students
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 do not need to spend
time
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 preparing for school or commuting, which can be
time
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-consuming.
Instead
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, they can simply use their devices to join online classes from the comfort of their homes.
However
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, the lack of face-to-face interaction may hinder their communication skills. Over
time
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,
students
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 who primarily study online might feel awkward or uncomfortable in social situations, as they have limited experience engaging with people outside their families.
On the other hand
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, attending
offline
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 classes enhances
students
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' social skills and real-life interactions. In a traditional classroom setting,
students
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 not only learn academic subjects but
also
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 develop their communication abilities through direct interaction with teachers and peers.
For example
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, engaging in face-to-face discussions with classmates fosters empathy, understanding, and teamwork—qualities that are difficult to cultivate in an online learning environment. In conclusion,
while
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 online learning helps
students
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 save
time
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 and focus more on their studies, it may reduce their ability to interact effectively in social settings.
In contrast
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,
offline
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 learning provides valuable interpersonal experiences, allowing
students
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 to adapt to diverse environments and develop essential social skills.

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Task Achievement
Consider providing a clearer thesis statement in the introduction that explicitly outlines your opinion on the topic. This helps the reader understand your stance from the outset.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to use more varied linking words and phrases to improve the flow between ideas and paragraphs, which can enhance the overall coherence of your essay.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more specific examples or evidence to support your arguments, especially in the paragraphs discussing each learning method. This can strengthen your points further.
Task Achievement
Your essay presents a balanced view of both online and offline learning, showcasing a good understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
The contrasts you make between online and offline learning are well articulated and easy to follow, demonstrating effective coherence between your ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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