IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

decison shold be taken by leader or by employees both views

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It is undeniable that a single person should not be able to run the company on their own since it is not possible for the manager can make all the
decisions
Use synonyms
 by himself rather than discussing them with others.
While
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 others considered that employees should be involved in the decision-making process too.
This
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 essay will analyse both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
viewpoints including my opinion in the following paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, there are several reasons why
decisions
Use synonyms
 ought to be the responsibility of a leader only.
Firstly
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, they have the experience and vision that come with leadership roles which allow them to access any problem from a broader perspective and allow them to make informed and strategic
decisions
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
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, centralizing decision-making in the hands of one person ensures consistency and aligns with the company's long-term goals without being influenced by individual biases or departmental interests because when the count of individuals increases to
take
Correct your spelling
make
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decisions
Use synonyms
then
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 it takes a longer duration of time to implement the idea which sometimes becomes a barrier in companies growth.
Therefore
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, it becomes the reason for the downfall of the organisation.
On the other hand
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, critics of the former nation
declares
Change the verb form
declare
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 that the lack of involvement of employees makes them feel disrespected which makes them less productive. To be precise, workers are like the roots of any place and without them it is impossible to achieve any goal if they get unsatisfied with their job , it becomes difficult for that place to progress
further
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.
For instance
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, In Pakistan, leaders of the companies are solely responsible for
decisions
Use synonyms
 taken there which becomes the prominent reason for the decline in their whole economy.
To conclude
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,
although
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 one person can
take
Correct your spelling
make
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 any decision in less time, it is not true that the decision taken by him is always right.
Additionally
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, declining the interest of individuals working there is not good for the whole company.

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coherence cohesion
Try to deliver your ideas in a more organized way, ensuring that each paragraph has a clear theme and all ideas flow logically from one to the next.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your points, making your argument more concrete and compelling.
task achievement
Make sure all parts of the essay prompt are responded to fully, perhaps by expanding on some points or exploring additional perspectives.
coherence cohesion
You have successfully introduced the topic and presented your opinion clearly in the beginning.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your discussion.
task achievement
You've presented two viewpoints and offered your own opinion, addressing the task prompt.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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