Big companies should provide social and sports facilities for local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is generally believed that corporations not
merely
Rephrase
only

There may be an adverb issue here.

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contribute to society through taxes they pay but
also
Linking Words

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develop public
facilities
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

such
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as sports fields and community services. I firmly agree with
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

opinion
due
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

to
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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a vast range of reasons
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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some of these motives will be addressed in
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay. One of the most compelling reasons why providing amenities for local people should be a concern for big companies is that they play a vital role in companies’ credibility. Engaging in local community activities strengthens their reputation in public and enhances companies’ profit.
For instance
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, one of the renowned factories, PT Sampoerna, built clean water and sanitation
facilities
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for rural villages and established an educational foundation as a part of community services.
As a result
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they easily expand branch factories in several locations without hardly being accepted by surrounding households since they believe they will be responsible
as well as
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

bring well-being to them.
Furthermore
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, when massive corporations build
facilities
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for the public, they can help governments to decrease unemployment rates
for
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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countries. Public
facilities
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like libraries, sports arenas, or parks offer job opportunities to take care of these places. In fact, a survey has shown that the development of public amenities by private absorbed 52% of the workforce around it, which directly contributes to societies’ welfare.
This
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

demonstrates that the involvement of big companies in providing essential
facilities
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for
surroundings
Correct article usage
the surroundings

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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is beneficial for all parties. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

various ways contribute to companies’ success, providing public
facilities
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for local communities should remain a primary plan, as they foster credibility, profits, and support for communities’ well-being.

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly communicates one main idea, with adequate development and explanation of that idea.
task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples or data to strengthen the argument in the second body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structures and vocabulary to create a more engaging and dynamic writing style.
task achievement
The introduction presents a clear stance on the topic and outlines the reasons for this position effectively.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points and reinforces the argument.
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