IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think history has little or nothing to offer, while others say the study of the past helps us understand the present. Discuss both viewpoints and give your opinion.

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It is argued whether
history
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 is useless or helpful to understand the present.
This
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 essay will examine both opinions and conclude that learning
history
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 helps us understand the current situation. Studying the past could be of no or little use for several reasons. One of the main viewpoints is that it does not seem very relevant to our daily lives. For those who are more keen
to
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on
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 playing games or cooking great dinners,
for example
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, learning about the past might not make a difference in their interests. Another reason is that
often times
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oftentimes
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, learning
history
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 at school focuses on memorizing the complicated names of historical figures or specific years of historical events rather than the ideas of philosophy behind the scenes. Having superficial knowledge will not be useful in understanding the present circumstances but rather it just makes the subject boring and a waste of time.
However
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,
history
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 can be enormously important when figuring out what to do for
the
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a
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 better future and understanding why our society behaves in certain ways.
For instance
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, think about how
the
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apply
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humans in the era of World War II ended up fighting each other and killing millions of people. Today we still witness wars outbreaking on the other side of the world. When you learn how people in the past should have avoided those miserable and horrific outcomes,
we
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you
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 might be able to change the path of our future for the better. In conclusion,
history
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 is essential to understand and navigate the present by applying what had happened in similar situations in the past and making the most of the lessons we learnt from it,
while
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 some people don't pay much attention
to
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apply
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outside of their day-to-day lives.

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coherence and cohesion
While the introduction presents the topic and states the intention of the essay, it could benefit from a clearer outline of the main points that will be discussed. This helps guide the reader.
task achievement
Consider providing more detailed explanations or analyses of the viewpoints in the main body paragraphs. This will enhance the depth of your arguments and clarify your position.
coherence and cohesion
Try to link your paragraphs more explicitly by using transition phrases or sentences that connect the ideas. This will enhance the overall flow of the essay.
task achievement
Remember to provide concrete examples in your arguments. While you have included some examples, adding more specific historical events or figures would strengthen your claims further.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear stance on the topic by concluding that history helps us understand the present. This gives the essay a focused argument.
task achievement
Several relevant points are made regarding the potential drawbacks of studying history as well as its benefits. This balance strengthens the discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • anachronistic
  • cultural heritage
  • perspective
  • historical context
  • societal norms
  • contemporary
  • evolution
  • progress
  • modern advancements
  • conflicts
  • tensions
  • academic
  • practical skills
  • subjective
  • victors
  • marginalized groups
  • dwelling on the past
  • irrelevant
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