Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, howeve, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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While
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it is commonly held belief that the best way to develop it throughout increasing the number of sports facilities. there is
also
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an argument that others consider that
this
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way is less effective than other measures.
However
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,
this
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essay will analyse the topic from both points of view , and express my opinion. On the one hand, sports facilities can encourage people to exercise more frequently.
In addition
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, it has a significant impact on our human body structure and shape. . It is
also
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true that increasing public
health
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and improving it by using new machines
that
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apply
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could speed up the results.
For example
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, the American researcher found that 75% of people who exercise in the gym a better
health
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and mentality than the other 25% .
On the other hand
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,
while
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there are many important measurements more than these facilities.
In other words
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, our meals and diet have a huge impact on our
health
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and
also
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can significantly develop it . But it is a long-term way we need at least 6 months to see the final results.
Moreover
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, cutting the bad habits is another level of measurement.
For instance
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, eating , and sleeping disorders and some negative thoughts. In conclusion, there is no essay answer to
this
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question ,
However
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, I tend to believe that both of them are critical and we need to follow them to improve human public
health
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, But I
also
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think that we would share the right method to get the desirable result

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion. Consider rephrasing to improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
Focus on structuring your body paragraphs more clearly. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and supporting details related to that idea.
task achievement
Provide a more balanced discussion by ensuring both sides of the argument are equally developed before presenting your opinion.
task achievement
Clarify your views in the conclusion and make sure it summarizes your main points more effectively.
task achievement
The essay attempts to discuss both views and includes some relevant examples, which is a positive aspect of task achievement.
coherence cohesion
You express a clear opinion in your conclusion, which is an important aspect of essay writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • obesity rates
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • multi-faceted approach
  • diet education
  • health screenings
  • government policies
  • pollution reduction
  • living conditions
  • community programs
  • mental health services
  • investment
  • accessible
  • complement
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