some people think spending a lot on birthday celebration or wedding ceremony is waste of money. Others think it is important for young people and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Nowadays, some communities believe that families are squandering tons of money on family

events

Use synonyms

such

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birthday

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parties and marriage functions,

while

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others reject

this

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notion and argue that it is important for youngsters and modern society to build strong relationships. The substantial influence of

this

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trend has sparked controversy over its potential influence in recent years. In my opinion, celebrating

such

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events

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is a waste of money.

This

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essay will

further

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elaborate on both perspectives and

thus

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will lead to a logical conclusion. Analyzing the statement

further

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, the primary reason why many people blindly spend funds on celebrations is to portray their luxury and gain respect from society. Rich people often invest their money in destination weddings and lavish

birthday

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events

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, frequently inviting celebrities to showcase glamour. In return for

this

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spending, they receive appreciation from society, which is completely illogical.

Instead

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of squandering funds on family functions, many believe that they should invest their income in properties or the banking sector, which ultimately helps them in the future. On second thought, a couple of reasons drive me to consider the opposite notion as well. Utilizing capital on birthdays and marriage

events

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has a direct connection with culture and social bonding.

Due to

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hectic lives, families rarely get the opportunity to socialize, and

such

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occasions serve as the only way to meet and greet relatives.

Birthday

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and wedding

events

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encourage youngsters to socialize with other relatives, meet their cousins, and build memories together.

Consequently

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, these

events

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help strengthen social connections. To recapitulate,

according to

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the arguments and aforementioned above, one can conclude that spending a huge amount of cash on

birthday

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celebrations and wedding ceremonies is an unethical practice in some communities.

Nevertheless

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, its potential benefits in promoting social activities and emotional bonding should not be overlooked either.

vairag4uMon Mar 10 2025

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task achievement

Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and your opinion. However, you may want to refine your thesis statement to more clearly indicate the points you will discuss. This would enhance clarity.

coherence and cohesion

In your main body, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to enhance coherence. For instance, you can use linking phrases to connect your ideas more effectively.

task achievement

While you provide valid points, incorporating more specific examples or data could strengthen your argument. For instance, you might mention studies or statistics related to the economic impact of such celebrations.

task achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion and addresses both sides of the argument, which demonstrates good task response.

coherence and cohesion

Your use of varied vocabulary and sentence structures contributes positively to the overall coherence of your writing.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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some people think spending a lot on birthday celebration or wedding ceremony is waste of money. Others think it is important for young people and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Technology is becoming progressively universal. In the fullness of time, classroom teachers will be totally substituted for technology. Do you agree or disagree?

•Nowadays, it is getting difficult for people to enjoy their lives in cities. Why do you think this is? What can the government do to make life in cities more enjoyable?

Some university students want to learn about different subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

Directors and managers are mostly older people. Some people believe young people will become better leaders. To what extent do you agree or disagree?