IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Modern buildings and skyscrapers are becoming highly popular. Discuss the statement and give your opinion

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The importance of living standards has completely changed, nowadays, numerous people prefer to accommodate in high-rise or multi-story apartments.
This
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 substantial influence of
this
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 trend has changed people's mindset. In my opinion, multi-story houses facilitate multiple benefits.
This
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 essay will
further
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 elaborate reasons behind
this
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 popularity and
thus
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 will lead to a logical conclusion. Analyzing the statement and explaining
further
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, the first and foremost reason behind
this
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 is that owning a house in an apartment building is less expensive than building a traditional home. Another striking benefit in
this
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 regard is that the location of skyscrapers often enhances high living standards.
For example
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, numerous multi-story assets are located in city areas or downtown, which provides easy access to multiple amenities
such
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 as a public Park, Cinema, Supermarket and Libraries. Probing ahead, one of the main underlying reasons stems from the fact that modern architecture of high-rise ownership improves air quality to maintain home temperature and ensures a sufficient amount of sunlight to alleviate
overall
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 health benefits and well-being. Categorically it can not be ignored that diversity in
such
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 assets fosters to exploration of various cultures and traditions, which ultimately facilitates a better understanding towards different cultures and religions and helps to build strong relationships with other residents. To recapitulate,
according to
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 the arguments and aforementioned, one reaches the conclusion that the demand for high-rise property is increasing, because it accelerates living standards, serves numerous amenities and improves
overall
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 health outcomes.
Nevertheless
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, its potential influence on financial enhancement and the advantages of multicultural exploration should not be overlooked either.

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task achievement
Consider expanding your examples to provide more specific instances that illustrate your points more vividly. For example, you might mention specific amenities available in high-rise buildings or cite studies related to health improvements.
coherence and cohesion
Work on having a more varied vocabulary to enhance the richness of your writing. Incorporate synonyms and diverse sentence structures to make your arguments more engaging.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure all points are clearly linked together logically, especially in your body paragraphs. Use transition phrases to guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.
coherence and cohesion
You have structured your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is a strong point.
task achievement
Your essay shows a good understanding of the topic and presents a balanced perspective with both benefits and potential drawbacks.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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