IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In recent times many people are making the decision to live alone. What are the causes of this? Does it have positive or negative effects on society?

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There is a considerable number of people who have decided to live alone. The main reasons are that adults consider it invasive and uncomfortable to share the same environment.
However
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,
due to
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 the high cost of living and difficulty of finding available apartments, achieving
this
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 goal is often not feasible.
As a result
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,
this
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 has led to negative impacts on society. In fact, private
space
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 issues lead a person to live alone.
For instance
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, in Brazil, it is uncommon for friends to share living spaces, as privacy and personal time are highly valued.
Furthermore
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, a major concern is the unpredictability of roommates.
For example
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, there is a significant chance that a roommate could have habits
such
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 as substance abuse or frequently coming home late and making noise at night, creating an unhealthy and uncomfortable living environment.
This
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 uncertainty is one of the main reasons why many Brazilians are reluctant to share their living
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, even with friends.
Additionally
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,
while
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 there is no doubt that Brazilians are driven by the desire to leave their parents' home and embrace independence, the cost of living and the complication of finding available housing have become significant obstacles to achieving that goal. The existing housing supply is insufficient to meet the demands of those seeking their own
space
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, creating a widespread challenge.
As a result
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,
this
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 often causes a high level of frustration and even health issues, directly impacting society.
To sum up
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, achieving independence is a goal for many, but financial constraints often make
this
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 dream unattainable. The growing desire for personal
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 and privacy has had a negative impact on society, as the high cost of living and the lack of adaptability to shared environments create additional challenges.

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task achievement
Consider expanding on the effects of living alone on society, including both the positive and negative aspects, to provide a more comprehensive view.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to maintain a clear logical flow between paragraphs; some transitions could be improved to enhance the overall coherence.
task achievement
Provide additional specific examples or evidence to support your points, especially regarding negative impacts on society, to improve the overall quality of the response.
task achievement
The introduction effectively presents the topic and outlines the main reasons for choosing to live alone.
coherence and cohesion
The essay maintains a clear structure with distinct paragraphs covering different aspects of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • autonomy
  • urbanization
  • social norms
  • digital communication
  • isolation
  • financial stability
  • personal development
  • changing values
  • communal living
  • career advancement
  • housing availability
  • loneliness
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