There are more new towns being built nowadays. It is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centres for individuals to spend their free time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
These days, the number of cities around the world is increasing rapidly.
In addition
Linking Words
, a group of people think that building green fields and sports centres is more crucial than malls for inhabitants to spend their leisure time. I subscribe to
this
Linking Words
perspective owing to the fact that these places have a positive effect on not only the environment but
also
Linking Words
people's health. On the one hand, the fact
that is
Linking Words
really important is that when the figure of public parks in one area increases, they become a new habitat for a range of animals and the air quality is improved.
In other words
Linking Words
, green lands are the best area for attracting wild creatures and have biodiversity;
moreover
Linking Words
, trees are the best items that can purify the air and enhance its quality.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, if people have access to the best public regions like parks and sports facilities, they spend their free time in these places. In fact, these amenities encourage them to do exercises to become far from a sedentary lifestyle and the problem that
this
Linking Words
method of life has.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, green areas provide an opportunity for the population to spend their time with their family members or do relaxation that influences their mental health.
To sum up
Linking Words
, woodlands and sports amenities are the best entertainment items for urbanization than shopping centres because they have a positive impact on air pollution and biodiversity.
Additionally
Linking Words
, they persuade individuals to do exercises and not be obese and have physical matters, and they aid them to are not at risk of mental issues.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples or statistics to support your points, especially when discussing health benefits or environmental impacts. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the connection between your paragraphs. Use more linking words or phrases to enhance the flow of ideas and ensure smooth transitions between points.
coherence and cohesion
In your conclusion, try to clearly reiterate your main thesis without introducing new points. Simply reaffirming the importance of parks and sports facilities over shopping centres will strengthen your final statement.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic and presents a clear opinion, which is essential for task achievement.
task achievement
You've made some good points regarding the benefits of green spaces on health and biodiversity, which adds depth to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • public parks
  • sports facilities
  • shopping centres
  • free time
  • well-being
  • physical exercise
  • sedentary lifestyles
  • sense of community
  • consumerism
  • green spaces
  • health and well-being
  • attractive
  • environment
  • air quality
  • biodiversity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: