𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐯𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐈-𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬, 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞. 𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠? 𝐈𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐚 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐧𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐝?

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Touring renowned locations mainly to shoot photos rather than truly experiencing the place is an increasingly common

trend

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay discusses why

this

Linking Words

behaviour is becoming prevalent and outlines why it has negative implications. Two primary drivers catalyse

this

Linking Words

trend

Use synonyms

. The first is the quest for the ideal photo, driven by social media’s influence. In an era dominated by digital status, more individuals aim to capture and share images that depict an idealised life, motivated by societal pressures and the lure of social media validation.

Additionally

Linking Words

, the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) compels people to rush to visit trending spots, before they become over-visited.

For instance

Linking Words

, several islands in the Philippines have been closed to tourists

due to

Linking Words

damage to the ecosystem,

such

Linking Words

as Boracay, and

this

Linking Words

has caused tourists to rush to other popular islands. These motivations,

however

Linking Words

, lead to significant negative consequences. The focus on photography over experience leads to shallow interactions with these locations, undermining the genuine cultural and educational enrichment travel typically provides.

Moreover

Linking Words

, driven by FOMO, the surge to these sites causes sudden overcrowding, is deteriorating local infrastructure and accelerating environmental degradation

due to

Linking Words

the increased footprint of tourists.

Such

Linking Words

impacts degrade the local communities and natural settings. In conclusion, the

trend

Use synonyms

of visiting famous sites primarily for photography is driven by the desire for perfect shots and influenced by FOMO. It has negative outcomes as it promotes surface-level engagement with important locales and creates environmental and infrastructural strains.

This

Linking Words

trend

Use synonyms

potentially causes lasting damage to both the destinations and the depth of travellers’ experiences.

nargesamin0Sat Mar 15 2025

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Task Achievement

Consider expanding on your examples to provide more depth and data-backed information which could enhance the strength of your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

While your essay is well-structured, try to use more varied linking words and phrases to improve the flow between paragraphs.

Task Achievement

The essay presents a clear argument with well-defined reasons and consequences associated with the trend.

Coherence and Cohesion

The structure of the essay is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion that ties back to the main points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

bilingual
multilingual
fluency
communicate
cognitive skills
cultural awareness
opportunities
globalized world
job market
interact
linguistic abilities
cultural exchange
language proficiency
language barrier
foreign travel
personal growth
academic achievement
self-confidence
enhance
cross-cultural communication

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the houses or buildings they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

The use of mobile phones has increased rapidly in the twenty-first century. Additionally, cell phones can now be used for many purposes besides making phone calls. What are the advantages and disadvantages of cell phones?

Some people think governments should spend money on faster means of public transport. However, others think money should be spent on other priorities (e.g. cost, environment). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.