Some young people are living their countryside to live in cities and towns living only old people in the countryside. What problem does this cause? What can be done to solve the problem?

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In recent years, there has been a tremendous increase in the number of young individuals
are living
Wrong verb form
leaving
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their rural
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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to live in towns,
living
Verb problem
leaving
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only their grandparents in the rural
areas
Use synonyms
. The main reasons for
this
Linking Words
worrying trend are
due
Correct word choice
apply
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the
Correct your spelling
that
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rural
areas
Use synonyms
lack
the
Correct article usage
apply
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facilities
such
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as
,
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apply
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advanced education and
state of the art
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state-of-the-art
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hospitals. Or they
travels
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travel
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to urban
areas
Use synonyms
for the job purpose.
However
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, there are solutions readily available,
such
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as the governments can construct amenities for citizens and focus more on the local
areas
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in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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order to minimise the
under population
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under-population
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.
First,
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there is a point to be made that villages are missing the most crucial resources
that
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is
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are
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necessary for adults like universities, so they
forced
Add a missing verb
are forced
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to leave their own places
in
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with
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the aim of
upgrade
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upgrading
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their professional and personal
life
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lives
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.
For example
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, Pakistani citizens left their rural
areas
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and
migrate
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migrated
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to Lahore or Dubai.
Then
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, they complete their university studies and
by
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apply
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obtain a job
by
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with
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ease.
For
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this
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reason, it is evident that urban cities offer
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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great chances which help all individuals from poor
areas
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.
Moreover
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, the urban countries provide
neurmous
Correct your spelling
enormous
job opportunities because they have companies and industries that keep maintaining their economic status sustainable.
This
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being the case, if all younger leave their own homes, their parents and their original places will suffer from poverty and
underpopulations
Correct your spelling
underpopulation
under populations
. To resolve
this
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tourbling
Correct your spelling
troubling
issue, one viable solution is the authorities must focus on
Correct article usage
the countrysides
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countrysides
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countryside
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and try to enhance the important sectors, like hospitals and schools.
Furthermore
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, the residents have to be
corporative
Correct word choice
cooperative
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with each other and build the significant
areas
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which
assists
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assist
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younger to develop their career.
For instance
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, some educated people have the ability to teach pupils,
others
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and others
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have an experience in
constructions
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construction
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,
therefore
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by making
a
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apply
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teamwork
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team work
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the rural zones can
witnessed
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witness
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significant changes, that may reduce the migration of dwellers.
To conclude
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, the root causes are that ancient places
struggle
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struggled
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with missing advanced materials which forced adults to
left
Wrong verb form
leave
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the place where they
belong
Wrong verb form
belonged
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.
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However
Add a comma
However,
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it is still possible to turn the tide if councils take
a serious procedures
Correct the article-noun agreement
serious procedures
a serious procedure
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to boost the infrastructure of old
areas
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Ensure that the introduction clearly states the problem and the solutions that will be discussed in the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid redundancy in phrases. For example, instead of saying 'living only their grandparents in the rural areas', rephrase to 'leaving their grandparents behind in rural areas'.
task response
Ensure that ideas are fully developed and clearly linked to the thesis statement. For example, expand on how improved facilities will directly benefit younger people staying in the countryside.
coherence and cohesion
Use more varied and sophisticated vocabulary. Some phrases can be repetitive, such as 'focus on local areas', consider rephrasing this using synonyms.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to proofread for grammatical accuracy, particularly subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'young individuals are living their rural area' should be 'young individuals are leaving their rural areas').
task achievement
The essay addresses both the problems and potential solutions, demonstrating an understanding of the topic and its complexities.
task achievement
There are relevant examples provided, such as Pakistanis moving to larger cities, which adds depth to the argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • migration
  • demographic shift
  • economic decline
  • aging population
  • community engagement
  • social cohesion
  • agricultural knowledge
  • urban sprawl
  • environmental degradation
  • educational opportunities
  • workforce
  • investment
  • local economy
  • healthcare services
  • social services
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