Due to the influence of world-wide media such as television and computers, the gap between cultures is narrowing. The introduction of this global culture is of great benefit to the world. To what extent do you agree with this point of view?

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With the rise of global

media

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such

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as television and computers, the gap between

cultures

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is slowly narrowing. Some

people

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believe that the introduction of a global

culture

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is highly beneficial to the world.

While

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I agree that global

media

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can have positive effects, I think there are

also

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some negative aspects to consider. On one hand, the spread of global

culture

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can bring many benefits. One advantage is that it allows

people

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from different

cultures

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to better understand each other. Through television shows, movies, and the internet,

people

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are exposed to different ways of life, traditions, and values.

This

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helps create a sense of global unity and tolerance.

For example

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people

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in different countries can now learn about each other’s customs and beliefs, which can promote peace and reduce misunderstandings.

Moreover

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, global

media

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can help

people

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access information more easily. News, educational content, and entertainment are all available worldwide.

This

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makes it easier for

people

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to stay informed about important events, whether they are local or international. It can

also

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open up new opportunities for

people

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to learn new languages, explore new ideas, and connect with others globally.

However

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, there are

also

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some drawbacks to the spread of global

culture

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. One concern is that local

cultures

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may lose their identity as they become influenced by global

media

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For instance

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, traditional practices and languages may be forgotten as

people

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adopt more globalized habits,

such

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as dressing in Western clothes or eating fast food.

This

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could lead to a loss of cultural diversity, which is an important part of the world’s heritage. In conclusion,

while

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the spread of global

culture

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through

media

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has its benefits,

such

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as promoting understanding and access to information, it

also

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has drawbacks,

such

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as the potential loss of local traditions. In my opinion, the world should find a balance between embracing global

culture

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and preserving local

cultures

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d.saruul888Wed Mar 19 2025

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Task Achievement

While your arguments are clear, ensure you provide a bit more depth in your analysis of the negative aspects, perhaps by offering specific examples or statistics to further illustrate your point.

Coherence and Cohesion

Consider using more varied linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your ideas between paragraphs and sentences, which can make your writing even more cohesive.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.

Task Achievement

You successfully present both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced view and thorough understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

311 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

world-wide media
narrowing the gap
global culture
exchange
understanding
access to information
entertainment
promotion of diversity
acceptance
global awareness
empathy
integration
popular culture
challenges
traditions
customs

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Due to the influence of world-wide media such as television and computers, the gap between cultures is narrowing. The introduction of this global culture is of great benefit to the world. To what extent do you agree with this point of view?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Numerous animal species worldwide are currently facing extinction. Some argue that countries and individuals should prioritize protecting these animals, while others believe resources should be focused more on human issues. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decresing. Do you think this is a positive/negative development?

In many countries government are interesting in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening Do you think this is an appreciate use of government money?