"Scientists and technology experts seem to be more valued by modern society than musicians and artists. To what extent do you agree?"

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In many parts of the world, some people are convinced that experts in science and innovation are more valued than creative professionals. I strongly agree with
this
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view as I believe that
scientists
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and tech specialists play a greater role in improving people’s lives and shaping the future. First of all, STEM professionals make remarkable breakthroughs that have long-term benefits for society.
This
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fact is accompanied by modern devices and technological developments
such
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as phones, computers, and laptops that make everyday life faster and more convenient.
For example
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, the person who first invented the lightbulb brought a lot of advantages to society; people succeeded in their amount of work and efficiency, students could do their homework at any time of the day and society
overall
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was no longer limited by natural light or afraid of the dark.
Secondly
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,
scientists
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and medical experts conduct important researches in medicine that improve people’s health. To provide an example,
scientists
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from a medical university discovered how to increase average life expectancy and improve metabolism. It helped people to gain a deeper understanding of a person’s body and the processes that go inside.
As a result
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, it made a huge breakthrough in science and medicine.
To conclude
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, I believe that
scientists
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and experts in technology are overestimated in comparison with artists and musicians,
due to
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the fact that they bring more valued research and breakthroughs.

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task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph develops a single clear idea that directly responds to the essay topic. You might want to elaborate on the significance of artists and musicians in your conclusion to provide a balanced view.
coherence and cohesion
Work on ensuring smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs. This can help enhance the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
Consider expanding your examples and making sure they fully illustrate your points. Providing more context or detail can reinforce your argument.
strength
Your essay presents a clear opinion and a logical structure, making it easy to follow.
strength
The use of examples to support your arguments is commendable, as it demonstrates a good understanding of the topic.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • valued
  • modern society
  • scientists
  • technology experts
  • musicians
  • artists
  • reliance
  • scientific advancements
  • practical benefits
  • driving economic growth
  • daily lives
  • culture
  • human emotions
  • express ideas
  • provoke thought
  • spiritual well-being
  • emotional well-being
  • preserving cultural heritage
  • subjective nature
  • diversity
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