Many young people say that mobile phones are the most important object that they own. Does the popularity of mobile phones among young people have more advantages or disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays, sophisticated technology provides a lot of conveniences for human working,

for instance

Linking Words

, a mobile phone can give many things anywhere and anytime. In the young generation, a mobile phone is the most important object that they own. The popularity of handphones has more advantages among youth,

while

Linking Words

there are several disadvantages brought by

this

Linking Words

trend. Looking first at the benefits,

this

Linking Words

device makes many jobs become easier.

Firstly

Linking Words

, communities can communicate with each other by the online applications provided by phones,

such

Linking Words

as WhatsApp, Messenger, and Social Media. They can talk long distances through voice calls and video calls.

Secondly

Linking Words

, the workers can create hybrid meetings on their own devices to discuss a problem. They should not meet directly, they can meet anywhere by online meeting platforms.

Thirdly

Linking Words

, they can share anything by online chat,

such

Linking Words

as presentation documents, papers, pictures, and videos to support details for their tasks.

Moreover

Linking Words

, they can access various information wherever and whenever from the Internet to create an assignment.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are some drawbacks offered by

this

Linking Words

condition.

For example

Linking Words

, the accessibility of information from the Internet creates a lot of crimes in plagiarism. There is no protection in the sources of data. People can copy and paste anything from the Website without knowing the original references.

In addition

Linking Words

, sometimes personal details

also

Linking Words

can be accessed through the Internet. It is a danger for citizens

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because many criminals use society's data for their personal goals. In conclusion, mobiles are now extremely crucial for human living. It provides obvious positive changes to their lives,

such

Linking Words

as more efficiency in work.

However

Linking Words

, it brings several dangers for communities.

imeldarosari6Sun Mar 30 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Consider adding more detailed examples to illustrate your points. For instance, when discussing communication apps, you could mention specific scenarios where they have made a difference.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that your arguments are balanced. While you present good advantages, make sure to elaborate on the disadvantages with equal strength in your analysis.

Coherence and Cohesion

Try to vary your sentence structures to enhance the flow of your writing. This can help maintain reader engagement and clarify your ideas.

Task Achievement

You effectively outlined both the advantages and disadvantages of mobile phones, which demonstrates a good understanding of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay has a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which aids in comprehension.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

276 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achive anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
It is certainly true that encourage kids and tell them they can achieve their goals if they try their best and work hard. However, not all the effects of this innovation have been positive, although there are certainly some advantages.
6
band
The movement of people from agricultural areas to big cities caused problems in both palces. In your oponion, what is the reason for this problem? How can it be solved?
Nowadays, a significant number of people move from cultivating spots to the primary towns for a lot of reasons although this movement has some advantages for the public, some drawbacks can happen in both areas. In this essay, I will illustrate the causes of these drawbacks and how to address them.
7
band
Many people think that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.
There is no denying the fact that health is the most crucial factor for every society. While it is a commonly held belief that increasing the number of sports activities enhances public health, there is also an argument that public health has alternative ways to improve it. This essay will analyse this topic from both points of view and express my opinion.
8
band
In developed countries, more and more people buy and use their cars. Do the advantages for people of car using outweight its disadvantages on environment.
Economic growth around the world has led to a surge in owning private vehicles. Although both individuals and society benefit from this approach, I believe that environmental damage outweighs the benefits.
8
band
The world's resources are being consumed at an ever-increased rate. What are the dangers of this situation? What should we do?
It is widely argued that the level of natural resource consumption is increasing more and more around the world. This essay attempts to shed light on the detrimental impacts of this negative tendency before outlining several viable solutions that should be adopted to tackle it.

Many young people say that mobile phones are the most important object that they own. Does the popularity of mobile phones among young people have more advantages or disadvantages?

Your opinion

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achive anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

The movement of people from agricultural areas to big cities caused problems in both palces. In your oponion, what is the reason for this problem? How can it be solved?

Many people think that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

In developed countries, more and more people buy and use their cars. Do the advantages for people of car using outweight its disadvantages on environment.

The world's resources are being consumed at an ever-increased rate. What are the dangers of this situation? What should we do?